Suffering as a gateway to bliss
I frequently see people who have spent years trying to heal their pain or condition and they feel like they have done all their inner work, yet feel frustrated, exhausted and at a loss as to why they still experience pain, disease or discomfort.
I have found that the reason why there seems to be a gap between our inner work or “spiritual knowing” and our physical experience is because there is a resistance to or grasping onto of something that we have not yet discovered. Essentially there is some aspect of ourselves that we have not fully seen, felt and opened our heart too.
Allowing ourselves to suffer is actually the quickest way to heal, however most of us really have no clue how to suffer. We spend an exorbitant amount of time, resources and energy on avoiding suffering, and we don’t even know we are doing this most of time. This shows up in a million ways.
Some examples would be “overdoing” so you never have time to stop and pay attention to what is going on beneath the surface. Or overthinking so you stay wrapped up in your story thinking you are gaining insights, but really are on your hamster wheel. Avoidant eating, shopping, drinking, drugs (recreational or prescription), facebooking or any activity done with the intention to “decompress” or get the edge off. These activities can dissipate your charge, which is an ok starting ground, however people stop there and often don’t then inquire as to what they are trying to “decompress” from. What is it that they don’t want to see, feel, look at and be with?
Learning to suffer well
Many people say things such as “I’ve already experienced so much pain from such and such experience in my life (typically referring to a traumatic experience), how could I feel more around it”? This can also look like people saying things like “I’ve already worked through that issue, (maybe referencing worthiness, insecurity or the need to be liked), so this couldn’t be related to that still, I’ve already healed that.” This often comes with an underlying unwillingness or resistance to experience anything more around it.
When you’ve really healed an aspect of yourself you will no longer have the relationship to it where you are unwilling to return to it. In fact, it’s the opposite. This aspect has become so integrated as a part of you now that there is nothing to resist or dread to return too. Instead only love is present. If you don’t feel this overwhelming love when you think of it, then there is more work do.
So the question becomes how do you start to discover what else might be going on, what you are still resisting or grasping onto, so that you can actually experience suffering rather than staying on the edges of it, thinking about it or creating stories around it?
What’s required is true desire to discover, heal and resolve whatever shows up and love it like crazy. If you remain unwilling to love what presents itself, you will not heal. Instead you will stay separate from this aspect of you and therefore some level of suffering will always be present, either consciously in your mind or unconsciously as expressed through your body as pain, disease or chronic illness.
Stage 1 of Somato-Respiratory Integration is a powerful tool that provides a framework for you to use in order to bring to conscious awareness those things which are currently hidden from your sight, so that you can then make the choice to either resist or to accept and love. Continued resistance creates more suffering and newfound acceptance creates a gateway to bliss.
Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado