TINY LITTLE PEACE DISRUPTERS

TINY LITTLE PEACE DISRUPTERS 

Good days and bad days

Most all of us desire a state of inner peace.  That sustainably stable center of being, that remains undisturbed regardless of situation or circumstance.  I really don’t know anyone who isn’t in someway looking or desiring this for themselves.  Often times we taste peace.  For example we might wake up in the morning after a great night’s sleep feeling rested and fantastic.  Then we start our day and tiny little peace disrupters attempt to find their way inside of our experiences.  Maybe our partner is grouchy and that affects our state of joy a little bit.  Perhaps we don’t have the food in our refrigerator that we want to eat for breakfast because our kids ate it last night.  Possibly you receive a phone call from your doctor telling you they didn’t like the look of some your routine blood work that you did last week for your annual check up.  Then you get in your car, start it up and it’s making some strange noise.  You arrive at your scheduled lunch meeting only to find out the person you are meeting is running 40 minutes late.  You get the idea.  The list could go on and on and on endlessly forever.  

It’s really no wonder that we feel stressed out most of time and not really as present and centered as we’d like to be.  It seems to be that there are a thousand tiny, little (and sometimes big) peace disrupters that happen in a give day.  You can find them in nearly every moment it seems.  Little ways that life does not appear to run smoothly, where things are less desirable than we want them to be, and where life just doesn’t feel like we want it to feel.  We worry about the outcome of all the things and if everything will turn out alright.  We dread the hassle of taking care of things that we aren’t sometimes even sure how to take care of.  We live in this state of a sort of powerlessness to life and its occurrences, and we hold our breath while we are in the uncertainty of it all.  I’d say that this is a pretty regular experience of life for most.  

Days that we call “good days” are typically days where we either perceive that less peace disrupters are present or where they are present but don’t seem to effect us.  In these situations it is often that something that we perceive as really good happened in a day so we are less easily affected by the other going ons of life.  It can also be that we have more distance from the occurrences of life on a given day (i.e. less attachment to the outcome of things and more acceptance of what is) so the little things seem to grab us less.  Some things are easier for us to accept, others not as much.  The more we resistance we create, the less resourced and energized we are and the more those tiny little peace disrupters run the show. 

STABLE INNER CENTER 

Playing the game of challenge

All of those tiny little peace disrupters are really just little challengers in the game of life.  They are opportunities for you to learn greater and greater inner stability.  One of the things I hear most frequently from people whom I work with is that they want to have stability in feeling good, energized, joyful and in their center or truth.  They want to less taken by the circumstance of life and be in more choice about what and how they are feeling on a day to day basis.  So often people don’t feel in choice about how they are feeling and that is actually what feels bad, that is not being in choice and not necessarily the bad feeling itself.

One of the fundamental perspectives to take on this whole matter is that everything that happens is happening for you not to you.  If you make that shift in perspective than you can easily see that all of those tiny little peace disrupters (and even the big ones) are simply coming into your experience to help you learn how to have a stable inner center.  See we ask to have a stable inner center and yet when we are given a thousand opportunities a day to practice it we fail to see that we are being given exactly that which we need to learn exactly that which we desire to learn.  It’s tricky because when we see through the perspective that life is happening to us we feel powerless to circumstance and feel that we have no choice in the matter of how we feel about what is happening to us.  However if we pick up and put on a different pair of glasses for the day, glasses that see that every single occurrence inside of our experience is happening for us then we are much more readily available to learn from life rather than feel victim to it.  We can also more clearly see things as opportunities to learn and not as permanent, never ending states of being of which we will never escape.

Most people don’t realize how powerful they are.  In fact most don’t realize that they have any power at all.  Some level of denial, confusion and lack of awareness seems to be present for most people when it comes to knowing themselves as the all powerful creators that they are.  Yet the evidence is everywhere.  How you perceive everything that you perceive is evidence of your power.  How you perceive is how you will experience life.  What is more powerful than that?  How you perceive is how you create and thus how you will experience life.  At any moment your free will to perceive is intact.  Free will the first expression of creation.  It is what you are.  Free will itself.  You are free to perceive however it is you would like to, and you will thus create an experience of life based on your perception.  Perception is creation.  If you see things as bad or wrong, you will experience bad, wrong or the threat of bad/wrong.  If you see things as good, you will experience good and that life is working for you.  

It is really that simple folks.  You might like to insist that you don’t have any power, and that you can’t change how you perceive, but you’re the only one that can.  No one can give you a stable inner center.  Tools, techniques and programs can guide you towards it, but ultimately you must learn it through the opportunity of tiny little (and sometimes big) peace disrupters.  The gift of them is the re-remembering your power and your never ending free will to perceive/create as you’d like.

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

UNWINDING NEUROLOGICAL DEFENSE

UNWINDING NEUROLOGICAL DEFENSE 

Dismantling our protection from pain

We’ve all experienced tension.  That tight, constricted, unrelaxed feeling.  Sometimes it feels hard to breathe.  It can come with feeling overwhelmed and like there isn’t enough time or resources available to us.  It can be challenging to discover and feel what we are feeling.  Often it comes with uncomfortable sensations in the body.  Tension is means of protection.  We create tension, and our body feels that tension, in order to protect us from pain, when we perceive that pain might be present or imminent.  The pain, which tension is protecting us from, isn’t always clearly evident to us.  Yet if we investigate we can always find the thing we are attempting to avoid feeling or experiencing.  

Pain can come in many forms.  It can be purely at the body/sensation level.  You might experience this in a car accident or a fall where you finding yourself bracing (i.e. creating tension) in order to protect the body from damage and lessen the impact.  You may also have a chronically painful part of your body.   Often we create tension around that area in order to attempt to not feel the pain as much.  It’s not the tension that is painful even if that is what we think is the source of the pain.  The true source of the pain is often below the tension.  The tension is the means to dull what is underneath it.  Pain can also be felt at the emotional level.  The root of most emotional pain is the fear/experience of being unloved or unlovable.  At the next level up pain felt at the mental levels is often rooted in not being enough, sharing enough or having anything worthy to give/be.  Lastly pain is also experienced at the spiritual level, which is rooted in believing we are separate from spirit/God.  

Due to the fact that most people don’t want to experience pain we learn to create protection or defense from it.  We gear up and create armoring.  This armoring is like a neurological suit that we wear that we don’t even know that we are wearing.  Everything we experience or interact with gets to come into contact with this suit.  The suit is a filter.  It’s not who we are, but it is often who we think we are and also who others perceive us to be.  Loosely you could call this our personality, and it also comes with a particular way we posture our body, talk, walk, think, perceive, dress, eat, behave and the sensations we have or don’t have.  It colors our entire world.  The suit comes with wiring.  That wiring is called neurological defense.  There are patterns and architecture to neurological defense.  These patterns are specifically what Network Chiropractic addresses.  Network assesses for the patterns that are present and helps wake up awareness and liberate energy inside these patterns of protection, so that your true self may be known to you.   

OPENING INTO THE HEART 

Rewriting the nervous system

The true self is the heart.  It is that space or experience of relaxation and easefulness that is joyfully and blissfully present.  It is light and spacious.  It is all inclusive and allows everything inside of it to be as it is.  It is energized and alive.  It is awake.  It sees nothing as wrong.  There is no resistance and we feel just as our self.  Nothing to hide, protect, avoid, or run away from experiencing.  It is that which we are all hungry for and finding our way into in our own ways.  The heart is not just for some people or for some times.  It is for all times and all people.  

The heart seems absent, foreign or mysterious to us when we are in a state of neurological defense.  When we are in protection mode we view ourselves as a subject/object that is independent from other subject/objects.  This is how most beings in the world view themselves and also why there is such a disconnection from the heart amongst our collective at large.  When separation is the predominant perspective than there is always something/someone to protect ourselves from.  Yet when that predominant perceptive changes to non-separation or unity, than protection becomes nonsensical and arbitrary.  

The heart isn’t something hard to find.  Its all pervasive, ever present and never comes or goes.  What does come or go is our focus or attention on it.  When our focus and attention is wrapped up in all the ways we need to protect ourselves to physically survive, get all of our emotional needs met and to satisfy the demands of the stories we’ve learned to tell ourselves about what our life is supposed to be and who we are supposed to be, then the heart is not in our view.  Shifting priorities, changing stories and reconditioning the neurological patterns present in your energetic and physical configuration is required in order to experience life as heart.  

Opening into the heart is closer than you think.  It’s not too hard to find/feel glimpses of it.  These glimpses are important as they start to light up pathways that don’t get lit up that frequently inside most people’s nervous systems.  This is what Network entrainments provide the container for as well.  During entrainments an energetic field is created that is organized in such a way to amplify the experience of heart for you.  While the gentle contacts along the spine help dismantle neurological defense, this field or container of the heart is readily present and available.  With continued tastes, touches and glimpses of this field of the heart, a person can receive and exchange more and more energy and awareness with this field.  The energy, awareness and perspective of heart then becomes the dominant program in your system.  The heart starts speaking louder than the pathways that are fighting for survival and viewing life from a scarce and separate perspective.  This is the progression, the objective and the intention.  It’s simple.  It’s available.  It’s time is ripe.  

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING

YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO  ANYTHING

Fear of badness

So often we feel this pressure, pull or weight to do.  That we have to do against our will or desire to do.  There seems to be an ultimatum if we don’t do.  We fear that if we don’t do whatever it is that we think we have to do, then something bad will happen.  We don’t even typically know what will happen, we just think that it will be bad.  This fear of “badness” and of not wanting to feel it, keeps us locked into the feeling state of being trapped, and the thought that we must do even when we aren’t sure what to do or feel strong opposition to the doing we think that we must do.  

One of the pivotal things to accept is that as humans we are essentially blind.  Spiritually blind that is.  In many ways we are masked, muted and confused.  We can see the appearance or expression of life, but we can’t see the source of it.   We don’t know who we are or what’s really going on beyond what we’ve been taught by other beings who are similarly confused.  When you accept that you are, by nature of this human experience, highly confused and that its okay to be confused, its much easier to take the pressure off of yourself.  That pressure to do something because you fear badness is alleviated when you accept your own state of blindness.

When we accept that we mostly don’t know anything we can realize that even our projected fear of badness is inaccurate.  The truth is we don’t know if something bad will happen or not happen based on our doing or non-doing.  We may create elaborate stories based on ideas in our mind or on previous life experiences, and yet even so we don’t know what will truly happen, ever.  All of the doubt we feel in our decision making processes (i.e. the pressure we feel) is simply rooted in the perspective that one way is good and another is bad.  One way is right and another wrong.  That the result of one choice is preferable and the other un-preferable.  

Rather than forcing yourself to do, take some kind of action, or make a decision, first giving yourself the permission to not know and not act is key.  Even though it seems like there are deadlines and timelines remember that all of that is made up.  It’s true that if certain “timelines” don’t get met than certain things may not occur, but remember there is no badness in the occurrence or non-occurrence.  Only the perspective you take on all of it matters.  There are truly no missed opportunities.  There is only what happens.  That may be hard for you mind to accept and your acceptance of that is key to your peace.   

WANTING EVERYTHING IN YOUR LIFE 

Doing from choice

Conjure up something in your mind that you think you have to do.  Maybe its your taxes, paying your bills, or a project for work or for hobby.  Perhaps its a conversation with someone, an email to write, a new diet or exercise to start, a relationship to end or a new job to start .  Make sure that whatever it is you bring into mind right now is something you think you have to do, rather than something you want to do or that you feel in neutral acceptance about doing.  Notice the pressure, heaviness, tension or perhaps scatter that occurs when you think about doing the thing.  Listen to the stories and thoughts that are occurring in your mind about having to do the thing.  Some of those stories that are flittering their way through your mind might have flavors of failure, dread, uncertainty and confusion.  Notice what ultimatums you are giving yourself if you don’t do the thing and how you might feel bad about yourself or about the outcome of doing or not doing.

Now feel what its like to give yourself the permission to not do the thing.  There might still be that initial dread or fear that something bad might happen, but let that story lift as well.  For just a few moments stop making all assumptions about what you think might happen and fully allow yourself to not know what the outcome might be or not be.  Be in the mystery.  Allow the not knowing to be present.  Give space for potentiality before making a concrete reality-assumption in your mind.  Now simply notice how you feel.  You should notice that you feel lighter.  That its easier to breathe.  That you are more present.  Continue to allow yourself to not have to make any decisions or take any actions in this moment and continue to notice your energy and feeling state.  

I recommend aiming for this more neutral and easeful state of being before taking any actions.  If you don’t you are simply reacting to illogical stories and disempowered patterning.  From your now current state of being check in and see if whatever it is you conjured up to do still feels relevant to do.  If it doesn’t then just let it go as its not serving you to keep entertaining it.  If it does still feel relevant than begin to see how it is something that you want to do rather than continuing the story that you have to do it.  In the shift to wanting to do it perhaps you notice that you feel like you don’t know how to do the thing, or maybe like you don’t have the resources (physical, emotional, mental or other) to do it.  Notice if this is the case.  These are the situations to seek support and advise from others.  Find the “how” so that your mind doesn’t put a stop to it or insist on keeping you victim to it.  In this way you begin to learn that there is nothing that you have to do.  There is only what you want to do or get to do.  When you have this as the relationship with everything in your life the pressure and tension is gone because you stop being in conflict with yourself.  When you are aligned with yourself there is still work and energy expenditure, but the tension of dread of what bad thing might happen is transformed into excitement for what you get to do instead.  You open more into the mystery and worry less of the outcome.  

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

CREATING FROM PEACE

CREATING FROM PEACE 

It’s possible 

We are constantly creating.  In fact we are creation machines.  Creators through and through.  There is nothing that you do that isn’t an act of creation.  From brushing your teeth in the morning to closing your eyes before bed, everything in between is an act of creation.  While some acts may seem more routine or mundane than others, they are all nonetheless still acts of creation, being birthed by and through you.  In most of the activities of our day we don’t really realize that we are creating, rather we see the activities of our day as our ‘“to do list” and we aspire to get everything done on the list.  Our sense of accomplishment, or rest or peace, is in the completion of our doing not in the act of doing it.  

Imagine for a moment what you would feel like if opened your eyes in the morning and your first line of priority was to generate a state of being of peace.  What if you did not allow yourself to get out of bed until peace was achieved throughout the entirety of your being.  No conflict, no restlessness, no worry, no thoughts of the day, just peace.  Now imagine getting out of bed and everything that you do comes from this state of peace.  How do you feel?  I’d imagine you feel totally amazing, and a feeling of fulfillment far beyond the satisfaction of getting things done.  Ask yourself now in this moment, do you believe it’s possible to operate and live life coming from peace?  If you don’t, what arises for you?  Many think they will not get things done, they believe all the stuff they want to produce won’t get created, and at the core of it they feel purposeless.  In general people derive a tremendous amount of their sense of worth from the things they do.  When the doing stops or gets threatened it feels like a threat to our value and worth.

To come from peace means you have nothing to prove (particularly your own worth and value) and nothing that you have to create or do.  It means you are creating/doing not from a sense of deficiency or perceiving a problem, but rather from pure joyful desire to create what you create and do what you do.  This is the end of inner chaos and dysregulation.  When you start with peace there are no problems to fix, only fun things to do with your body and mind.   How often do your creations come from lack, or from the perception that something is wrong that you think needs to be fixed or done?  Lack motivates most of our actions.  Yet if we zoom out and see a bigger picture, we can see that nothing is wrong and nothing needs fixed.  This seeing is foundational to consistently coming from peace.  You must only ask yourself how badly you want peace versus the chaos and dysregulation you regularly choose.  While it may seem that peace isn’t always available, it always is.  Even in the most distressed state of being, peace is there as an option for you to choose.  To step into it you must only let go of that which you are perceiving as wrong. 

BRINGING JOY TO EVERYTHING 

Creativity in action

Some people do not view themselves as creative, and yet it is impossible not to be.  What seems to distinguish someone who is “creative” versus someone who is “not creative” (which again is impossible) is how much fun they are having inside of their creation.  You could make the bed as a routine you do every morning, which may seem uncreative to you, or you could make the bed in joy, and alas it becomes a creation that feels creative to you.  You may find yourself making pillow and blanket art.  When you see that everything is creative nothing seems mundane anymore.  There is no more just getting through your day or your to do list.  Mundane is simply something we have yet to find how to bring joy too.  

When you start with peace, when you come from peace, you quickly realize that there is nowhere to get.  Most of our doing is an attempt to get to peace, but when you start in peace all of your attempts to get somewhere disappear.  You arrive and are alive.  Not the kind of alive that is a waking zombie that we call being human, but the awake kind of alive.  The rested alive wakefulness, which allows us to flow with life and for life to flow through us.  How wiling are you to give up your un-peace?  Are you ready to die to your insistence on chaos and distress?  Do you want to claim peace, joy and creativity as your consistent state of being from here on out?

It sometimes feels hard to imagine or believe that we can truly be peaceful.  Yet when we choose distress over peace we create a world of distress rather than peace, and while perhaps you have the perception that what you choose as one individual doesn’t really matter, it does.  Your choice for peace or distress impacts this collective reality that we experience as one consciousness.  We are all part of one unified awareness and we can’t help influence and impact one another.  The generation of reality starts and ends with awareness, with us.  We as one are the awareness that creates all, creates this entire universe, all dimensions of the cosmos.  You are more powerful that you currently dream you are.  

Find ways to bring joy to all that you create/do.  Rather than avoiding, ignoring or refusing to do things that you perceive as un-joyful, find ways to bring joy to them.  It is not the activity that is un-joyful, but rather your state of being from where you come from in your doing.  All creating can be made fun when you realize that nothing has to be done.  Release yourself from the prison of thinking that what you create needs to be created, and reclaim your joy.   This doesn’t mean that you won’t create or do, you will, but no longer will you need to for any reason whatsoever.  Here is where pure innocent organic joy is found.  Only your desire and choice to put your energy and attention where you put it will guide you.  No longer will you need anything from anything or anyone.  Nothing has to work out in any specific way according to your preferences and likes.  This is freedom.  You are the power for this.  Choose peace.  Come from peace.  Start in peace.  If you do the only reality you will experience will be joy, not because your reality is joy, but because that is what you choose.  

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

LACK OF PERCEIVED SELF-WORTH

LACK OF PERCEIVED  SELF-WORTH

Self-absorption & taking from the field

Not valuing ourselves is a rather common disposition among humans.  It tends to be more socially acceptable to share feelings of lack of self-worth than it is to share expressions of worthiness.  If someone is confident they are often viewed as arrogant or conceded, and if someone lacks self-worth they are viewed as altruistic or humble.  Due to this social conditioning many who are confident don’t share themselves fully for concern of not wanting to “make” others feel bad about themselves or appear non-caring or un-empathetic.  Meanwhile those that don’t value themselves set the social bar for the level of self-love that it’s ok to share and express.  

Not valuing one’s self is the lowest energy state.  It literally takes energy from everything that it interacts with because it never feels like it’s enough.  Not only does it perceive itself as not enough, but it views everything else from the same lens that it views itself.  It can’t not.  It does not give to the field, but rather takes from it.  It is the most self-absorbed state.  Some people may find this paradoxical because what is perceived as confident or arrogant is most commonly associated with self-absorption.  However this is opposite to the energetic dynamics that get played out.  

Understand that to not care for yourself or see value in who/what you are is not humble or altruistic.  You viewing yourself as less than does not make you more kind, loving or selfless.  Rather it makes you more selfish and more wrapped up in your own self-created delusion of inadequacy and lack.  This sucks the life out of you, and out of everything and everyone around you.  Lack of self-worth is like a black hole that absorbs all the light of the world into it and yet remains empty because there isn’t enough light in the entire universe to illuminate it.  

The only thing that can shift this is if that which views itself changes its perspective of itself, meaning you change your perception of yourself.  If rather than seeing yourself as lack and valueless, you see yourself as you truly are, which is abundant, complete and full.  If that simple perception shift occurs, than no longer does one need to get from its environment or from other people in order to attempt to fill itself up.  Only then will you stop sucking energy out of the field and become a radiating stream that gives to the field by its very beingness.  Rather than being self-absorbing you become self-emitting, shining light wherever you go.  Many desire this, to be a light, and yet simultaneously don’t understand that their perception of themselves and their worth influences all of the energetic dynamics about them.   

FUELING YOUR BELIEF IN SELF

Prisoned disempowerment or free will

The larger truth is that its impossible to not be worthy.  You can only perceive yourself to be unworthy, and that perception creates the reality you experience, whether it’s true or not.  The only questions become, how do you want to participate with/play the game of life, and will you wake up to your choice?  See nothing in life happens to you unless you view it as such; unless you choose the victim position.  Most people unconsciously choose the victim position because the sea our consciousness swims in is filled with that programming.   The whole process and point of waking up is to consciously recognize that you are choosing and also then what you are choosing.  In this way you can consciously create your world rather than blindly accept the status quo.  Just because the large majority of people choose prisoned disempowerment as their story doesn’t mean that you must as well.   

The fuel of the reality of prisoned disempowerment is re-enforcing the belief of non-worth, non-value, and powerlessness.   In this reality some people have power and some don’t.  Some people matter and some don’t.  Some people are valuable and some aren’t.  You must ask yourself if that is the reality that you want to fuel, and also be willing to see how you do fuel it though the “innocent” interaction you have with how you see yourself as unworthy.   If you desire to create a different reality you will require a different fuel source.  The reality of free will is fueled by the belief of infinite value, inherent worth and powerfulness.  What is required for you to experience free will is the knowing of your worth.  Your power is your worth, your worth is your power.  In this reality all have power, all matter and all are valuable.

Its important to know what reality your energetic vote and perception of self, contribute to creating.  People tend not to know the power of their inner dialogue and the power of the lenses that they wear when they look at self or at the world.  How you view becomes your reality.  Even though your power could never be more or less than it is, which is synonymous with saying that your worth could never be more or less than it is, in this relative game we are playing there are two ways to increase power/worth/energy.  One way is to control others; the other way is to empower others.  If you control others you then gain/take their free will and it adds to your own.  You gain power.  If you empower others you give free will and it adds to the greater collective all of which you are included.  This is essentially your “how to” recipe: view yourself as valuable, help others view themselves as such through your capacity to view yourself as such, create a lived reality where free will is your direct experience.  

Understand that to view yourself as unworthy or not valuable is to disregard the beauty of God and it’s creation.  It’s to deny the perfection of the creator expressed through you.  It’s paradoxically the most self-absorbed perspective through its rejection of self.  Its the lowest energy state, which you then experience as your life.  Through viewing yourself as unworthy you create a disempowered reality and willingly give your free will, your energy and your power over to it.  When will you have had enough?  When will you decide you are more then you’ve been perceiving yourself to be?  What will it take for you to stop insisting that you aren’t worthy?  How much more suffering are you willing to create by holding onto your view of unworthiness?  

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

PLAYING PATTERNS

PLAYING PATTERNS 

The matrix of creation

We all have patterns that we play out.  Patterns are strategies and ways of being that we’ve learned throughout our life in order to function and survive as a human being.  Patterns are not bad or good, they are simply what we’ve learned.  I’d say the majority of the population is not even aware that they operate utilizing learned patterns, but rather they believe that they are their patterns.  The bigger gestalt of our patterns make up our personality, which is often how we view ourselves or how others view us.  Without any patterns we would simply be what we are, which is pure awareness or love-light without conditioning.  Love-light is the substratum for all patterns or conditions to arise up out of.  There can be an intuitive knowing of this or a felt sense of what we are, yet largely most of us are identified as our personalities, aka as our patterns.  

It is rare for someone to completely see through the patterns that are present in themselves or in another, and to recognize what might be called the true Self or the love-light that is the essence.   However when true Self is glimpsed or seen by self or by other self, the effect we experience is bliss, joy, rapture or an opening into love because that is our natural state.  This direct experience or knowing of the Self is what spiritual seekers often aim to achieve through meditation and through other various healing practices.  

Being without patterns allows us to taste, see, and remember ourselves, and to experience our boundless or free state.  This is why so many seekers aim to un-condition themselves from the learning they have learned, from the personality they’ve adopted and from the bound configurations of energy that seem to interfere with their knowing or seeing of themselves.  Again patterns are not good or bad, they simply are, and they provide or lay the template for the experiences we have of life and for the ways in which we perceive life to be.  

Ultimately what patterns do, is distort the light from its pure essence and allow it to configure into different expressions, which gives us the infinite myriad of forms and experiences throughout this universe.  Patterns are what we call creation.  You can see the organization of patterns inside of any form, which allow it to express as it does.  What is pivotal to know is that you are not the pattern (ie. the distortion that light takes on), but rather that you are the light.  You are a priori to the pattern, the “Patterner” itself.   

PURPOSE OF PATTERNS 

Understanding relevance & readiness to shift

All patterns serve a purpose.  They all have relevance, which is why they exist.  If they didn’t serve you or serve the creator (which is you), they would not be.  Patterns seem to have a developmental life span.  Some patterns will exist over the course of your entire human lifespan, or start previous to it or go beyond it, if the patterns are foundational to why it is you exist or the lessons you came here to learn/share.  Other patterns will run their course and you will stop finding benefit in them and thus extinguish them from your distortion/pattern make up.  

As people are on a their seeking journey they often desire to shift up some of their patterns because they don’t like the experiences that they offer.  Perhaps you have a pattern that you feel blocks you from something you want to experience, which has created a hunger in you to dismantle that patterning within your energetic matrix.  That hunger becomes the energy source for you to investigate, see through and to be ready to dismantle the pattern.  Sometimes we feel done with a pattern, but it isn’t done with us.  Meaning we want to resolve something inside of us, but their is still learning or relevance in us experiencing/sharing the effects of that pattern.  People frequently feel frustration around this process as they want their experience to be different than it is and yet it persists.  If a pattern persists it is because you continue to find benefit in it.  You may or may not be aware of what that benefit is, but it is a worthwhile inner investigation to find out.  There are also situations where there is a larger benefit of the pattern remaining, which you can’t currently see from the perspective from which you are viewing.  Sometimes you can zoom your awareness out to see from a larger perspective and at other times the veiling of knowing why the pattern continues to exist is part of the learning for you.  

As much as anything can be accelerated or slowed down, which are both aspects of the illusion we call time, there can be an amplification of readiness in the system to move through and beyond a pattern.  I find that frequently our readiness and the penetrating through of a pattern happens in layers that work up to a final resolution.  When we are in the layers, sometimes rather than seeing progress inside of them, we view failure that we haven’t reached complete resolution.  I mention this in case you find yourself feeling like you have worked a pattern “forever” and haven’t found resolution of it yet.  First of all this human lifespan is incredibly short so its unlikely that you have worked it “forever”, but only what maybe seems like forever to you.  Two, its ok if the patten isn’t resolved yet.  If you simply permission that for yourself, I can promise you that you will resolve the pattern with much more ease and grace than you perhaps knew possible.  

In summary know that you are playing out patterns, but that you are not the pattern itself.  Patterns serve a purpose and function, which is why they exist.  Patterns can absolutely be resolved by you and through you once their relevance for your life theme, experience, learning and sharing has ran its course.  Know that the interplay of light and form is the play of creator and creation expressing infinite expressions, and try not to take your experience too seriously.   

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

LET YOUR WILD THROUGH

LET YOUR WILD THROUGH 

We all have wild in us

Let’s face it, most of us are living less than fully expressed.  We confine and conform ourselves to society’s standards, our friend’s and family’s exceptions, and our own thoughts about who we think we are and who we think we’re not.  There is such hunger for many to live expressed, to freely share themselves, to be their calling, which is simply just being themselves.  Yet despite this hunger that many have, the conforming, the placating others and the dimming down of ourselves wins the show.  Our fears of non-acceptance, non-love, and non-belonging outshine in our psyche and we bow down to the illusions of such realities.  

We all have wild in us.  That wild expresses differently, but we all have it.  If you have any doubts about this I give you full permission to erase them.  There is a fire that birthed us all and that spark never left us, it only got covered up.  Expressing yourself and letting your wild through doesn’t need to look any specific way.  You don’t need to run around looking crazy, or be seen by many, or save the world, though you can, all that is perfectly valid.  However what is required is that fear doesn’t run the show of your life.  That you choose your actions, your words, your expressions and your ways of being based on your own integrity and not what the world or even the thoughts in your own head tell you.  The only reference point that gets a say in living wild is your heart.  

The primary pitfalls that lead to a muted life are wanting approval by others, fearing we will hurt somebody by being ourselves and thinking that we are right from our current vantage point.  1: You will never be approved by all.  It just won’t happen.  It’s best to accept that one as quickly as possible.  Some will like you and some won’t.  Its ok to not be liked.  2: You being you is not going to hurt someone else or take anything away from them.  Each being is responsible for their own perspectives and it’s not your responsibility to navigate that for them.  It is their free will to believe and see as they do.  I am not saying don’t be kind, caring or attuned to others, but I am saying don’t allow someones else’s development or lack there of, decide who you are.  3: Being wild has nothing to do with being right.  The louder, more aggressive personality doesn’t win in wildness.  Rightness is still conforming, it’s conforming to your own perspective.  The only perspective I have ever had inside of wildness is love for all.  Not even my own mind’s ideas count or have credence.  There is an intelligence beyond your thoughts.  The gateway into is your heart.  Choosing love for every single expression lets you in. 

FINDING YOUR FULL EXPRESSION 

Being all of you

Now most of us have built up a lot of layers.  Layers of mental defense, layers of repressed feelings, and layers of bodily protective patterns.  It can sometimes seem like there is a lot in the way, and there is some truth to that.  Most people really don’t even know just how much is in the way of their wildness, or said another way, of their purely authentic being.   They only know that maybe they don’t have as much energy as they would like to have, or they don’t feel as good as they would like to feel in their body, or they can’t seem to find their purpose or drive in life.  These are the ever so frequent side effects of being covered up underneath a lot of layers.  

The good news is, is that the layers are not as solid as you think they are and the energy that configures them into their particular patterns can be reconfigured.  Nothing is permanent and nothing is broken.  Instead all is simply functioning and behaving/expressing itself based on the perspectives that keep it in place.  Yes everything seen and experienced is perspectives that have materialized.  There is no separate material independent from the perspective that holds it into place.  This again is good news because you are perceiver of your perspectives (conscious or not) and therefore, it is within your power and your free will to shift your perspectives at any moment you so choose.

Your wildness will always be more playful and less serious than your ordinary self.  Your wild one knows more than you do right now.  In fact to really let the wild one through at some point you must stop using thought as your primary means of knowing and open your mind into the space or dimension beyond thought.  Surrendering to not knowing is required to penetrate the layers of the mental defense.  I won’t lie, the wild one can seem crazy at times.  Crazy at least to our ordinary thinking mind and the way it sees life.  The intensity of love that our wild ones are can obliterate a thousand limited perspectives in a second.  It can tear apart your distorted ways of thinking and being in one breath.  It can consume you with overwhelming love in a heartbeat.  It can course through your physical form like a tsunami.  The wild one will bring you to your edge and it may even throw you off.  

See your wild one is not personal.  It doesn’t care much at all about your personal life.  The details of you as a separate individual, living a seemingly separate life don’t matter much to it.  It cares only about one thing, and that is that all knows itself and remembers itself as one love.  Perhaps the seeming de-personalization is off putting to you and that is totally great.  I can only share that from my experience it is so absolutely refreshing to be able to see that all of stuff and things I’ve placed so much worry, concern and thought into really don’t matter at all.  When you are there with your wild one, the levity and delight of seeing this feels nothing short of miraculously freeing.   

If it resonates I invite the wild one in you to come forth, out of the shells of conformity, flattening, and mundane reality.  Express yourself, be seen as different, unique, crazy, weird and wild.  Let what you are be known and shared.  The effects are more far reaching than you can imagine.  

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

HAVE FUN NOT KNOWING

HAVE FUN NOT KNOWING 

Welcoming uncertainty

Know, know, know.  We are eager to know what’s next, where we are going, what’s going to happen and how it’s all going to work out.  In fact we are so eager to know what will happen and to get to it already, that we don’t live in what is happening now.  The focus on the future, what it will bring or not bring, captivates our attention, consumes our thoughts and takes us right out of the present moment.  

We often don’t perceive much fun in not knowing.  In fact not knowing feels downright scary to most people as their sense of security, safety, validation and purpose is wrapped up in them knowing.  If you take a step back, a pretty far step back, and expand your perspective, you will see that everything is truly a mystery.  You’ve created routines, habits and schedules that make life look the same from day to day and give the appearance of knowing what is going to happen, but truly you don’t know.  If you stayed viewing from this larger perspective you would most likely start to notice feeling a sense of uncertainty and fear.  Due to this fear of uncertainty (which we mostly don’t let ourselves feel or even register that we feel) we do our best to create certainty.  Certainty in our relationships, our careers, the place we live, our families, our finances, our community, etc.  This artificially contrived sense of certainty gives us illusionary comfort in feeling that we will be ok because we know.  

So we must ask ourselves the question, how can not knowing be fun?  How can we change our relationship with uncertainty to one that feels good rather than one that feels bad?  If we don’t change our relationship with uncertainty than we will attempt to avoid it all costs because we perceive that it feels bad, and by nature we avoid things that don’t feel good.  However attempting to avoid uncertainty is also attempting to avoid the present since the present moment only reveals itself in the moment and not a single second before.  Trying to create certainty leads to a life that goes by and you don’t even know what really happened or if you even lived it.  You were so busy trying to get somewhere, figure out where you where headed and how to get there that you missed out on your life now.  Your life doesn’t happen in the future it happens now, this is it.   

LOVING WHAT IS 

Coming alive

One of the best ways to make not knowing fun and change your relationship with uncertainty is to love what is now.  To be a full fuck yes to what is here and committed to being here even if you don’t like what is here.  If you are busy living in fantasy land of what might happen, hasn’t happened yet or didn’t happen, you are screwed.  There really isn’t a more eloquent way to say it.  You are living in a made up world of “things will be better when…”, when I know my purpose, when I get a different job, when I have the relationship, partner or family I desire, when I find the perfect home, when I land my next gig or client, when I have this amount of money, when I find my next place to live, when I go on vacation, and on and on and on.  

To love what is stops you in your tracks.  It forces you to be present.  It forces your heart open.  It forces you to wake up and recognize what is here, what is already perfect, where you already are.  It does so really without any force at all, but will the power of love and loving.  When you choose to love what is rather than be somewhere other than you are (which is impossible by the way) you live for the first time.  To love is to live, to be alive.  Love requires that you let all resentments, hatreds, wrongness, failures, mistakes, imperfection, and the like go.  All of those perspectives keep you out of loving and therefore out of the present moment.  

Loving gives.  It gives to life.  It is what makes life come alive and be fun to live.  We all know this.  When uncertainty arises and you feel that sense of not knowing, and you recognize the pressure, stress or anxiety that are the side effects of your resistance to uncertainty, simply pause.  Take a breath.  Notice the feelings of stress, pressure, fear, and perhaps even doom and distress.  Notice that you are trying really hard to fight the feeling of not knowing, which comes with some threats to your sense of self, safety and purpose.  Simply allow.  Allow not knowing.  Open into the curiosity and even eventual playfulness that can arise from the mystery of what is to be revealed.  Don’t try to plan or figure out the reveal, when you will know, when you will get “there” wherever there is.  Just be here in the mystery of it.  Open into the mystery.  Invite it.  Welcome it.  Do not push it away or try to get through it.  Just be inside of it as if there is nothing to figure out and nowhere to go.  You already are where you are meant to be/go.  You already are doing what you are meant to be doing.  Will it change?  Yes it will always change.  

Trying to get (somewhere or something) contracts, tightens, constricts, and closes you off to all communication and information, whereas loving gives and allows for free exchange of energy, movement and information.  The paradox is that inside the mystery all is revealed, all is known.  Each moment fully informed, fully wise, fully self-aware.  That is the gift of presence, of the mystery, of the moment.  You can’t know from trying to know, but only from allowing the not known to be as it is.  In this way you create the space and container for all to be revealed to you inside the playful dance of creation.  

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

UNWINDING TENSION

UNWINDING TENSION 

Physical, emotional & mental pain

We’ve all experienced tension.  Tension can live in our muscles, bones, ligaments, organs, glands, cells, or any tissue or part of our physical body.  Tension can also live in our subtler (visually unseen) bodies such as our emotional, mental or soul bodies. We can be either conscious or unconscious of our tension.  For example we might be aware of tension in our neck muscles, but unaware of tension say in our kidneys or bladder.  Or we might be aware of tension in our belly, but unaware of tension in our spine.  There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to where tension shows up and whether or not we are aware of it.

Why is tension created?  Tension is a mechanism created, ultimately by us, to protect us from feeling pain or other uncomfortable sensations, feelings or thoughts.  For example say you are in a car accident.  You will most likely create some physical muscle guarding (tension) in order to protect underlying organ structures and also to not feel such intensity of physical pain.  This is the most obvious of expressions and easiest to be conscious of.  The more awareness you develop of yourself the more you can tune into subtler and subtler levels of tension that exist in your less dense bodies such as your emotional and mental bodies. Say for example you are in a relationship and your partner does something that triggers you in some way.  If you slow yourself down you will be able to track the tension in your emotional body that may or may not have a physical manifestation or expression.  If you do this you will be able to notice what emotional pain you are attempting to avoid or lessen through creating tension.  Same is true if you have a particular thought or thought pattern that is out of alignment with the truth.  That thought will create tension in your mental body that again may or may not have an emotional or physical expression, but if you slow yourself down enough you will be able to track what mental pain you are attempting to decrease through creating tension.

When we create tension we essentially block or dampen part of our experience.  This can be helpful in extreme physical or emotional situations where we don’t have the resources or awareness to integrate and process the experience that is happening as it is happening.  What will often happen then is that we will develop a certain tension/holding pattern in our system that stays in place until we feel safe and/or ready to allow the experience to be felt.  Sometimes unwinding happens naturally and organically once we are out of the intense situation.  However other times it doesn’t happen naturally as we aren’t quite ready to feel or have the resources to process what occurred.  So we stay in a more bound or closed state, also known as a tension/holding pattern, which again we may or may not be aware of.   

TRANSCENDING LIMITATION

Walking towards pain

Let’s face it, having a human experience is intense.  Whether or not you’ve had some particularly intense experiences or you’ve lived more of a “normal” life, it is pretty much guaranteed that you have some degree of tension/holding patterns in your system just by the nature of having this human incarnation.  Tension is not bad or wrong, it’s simply an effect of not desiring to feel something that doesn’t feel good.  You could also term this resistance.  Resistance is often not intentional, nor is the avoidance of pain necessarily evident to most.  Many people are unaware of how much they avoid discomfort of any kind, in fact most create their lives specifically to avoid pain.  Again none of this is fundamentally bad or wrong, instead it simply points to why we have the experiences, life and awareness that we have, which are frequently sprinkled or riddled with a sense of disconnection, limitation or blockage.    

Tension creates an arbitrary sense of separation and inherent sense of limitation.  Whether that separation or limitation is experienced physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually depends on the individual and what lessons they gave themselves to learn.  You are of course unlimited, eternal beingness that has no edges, limits, or incapabilities, but telling that to someone who is having a human experience is kind of like telling a kid that play isn’t real.  It just simply doesn’t compute. So while we are here in these bodies we must learn the lessons of separation/limitation in order to transcend our current perspectives of it. One of the ways to learn the lessons of limitation is through increasing your awareness of your tension patterns in both your physical & subtle bodies and walking towards pain rather away from it.  What we avoid we can’t experience and therefore can’t unwind.  If we can’t unwind the tension that was created than we stay stuck in a particular holding pattern in our physical and/or subtler bodies.  This then gives us the perpetual experience of limitation or lack of full self-expression because how we hold ourselves relates to how we see the world and therefore the experiences that we have.  

Say for example you really desire to experience blissful, ecstatic oneness with the the divine, yet simultaneously you have mental tension patterns (thoughts & beliefs) that tell you how unworthy you are.  You can’t know yourself as infinite worth if you are constantly avoiding the thought/belief of unworthiness or if you don’t even know its there.  The thought/belief unworthiness will create a tension pattern in your mental body that will feel like it blocks you from knowing yourself as infinite worth.  That must be moved towards and unwound through feeling that which is untrue (i.e. unworthiness and the pain associated with that thought).  For another example say you really want to be full self-expressed, but feel emotionally triggered for a good part of your days.  Being emotionally triggered is another way of saying that you are avoiding feeling emotional pain, and you can’t be fully self-expressed if you are simultaneously avoiding a part of yourself and your experience.  That would be a contradiction. 

The key to sustainably unwinding the tension patterns in your system is through walking towards what’s been avoided, which is often uncomfortable and the last place we want to go.  However freedom is through and not around those experiences.  The other option is to know unequivocally that you are love and remove all self-doubt of this truth instantly.  This is entirely possible, however not as probable as doing the work to increase awareness of yourself, your tensions, your avoidances and resistances, and then navigate right into them.  Not to stay there for eternity, but to walk right on through them, fully experiencing what they have to offer, and coming out as free, open love on the other side. 

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

GIVE, GIVE, GIVE

GIVE, GIVE, GIVE 

Stop withholding love

The most sustainably reliable way of being that produces fulfillment and happiness is giving.  Giving to others, giving to life, giving, giving, giving without any agenda or expectation of return.  Yet most of our energy and attention goes to what we will get from life.  We have been brainwashed into believing that getting is what brings us fulfillment, joy and happiness and that giving depletes our already scarce resources of time and energy.  Getting the relationship, the job, the family, the business, the vacation, the house, the attention, the perfect body, the healthy body, and on and on provides only the delusion of happiness in attainment   We even often only give in order to get, meaning we give ourselves to people or things in order get a result or something in return.

What does pure, without agenda or expectation giving, even look like?  To make it really simple it means that you would have to not want or need anything from anything or anyone.  This includes things like wanting love, attention, desire, recognition, acknowledgment, and praise, as well as survival needs such as financial or living support.  I get that that can seem like a really tall order and many people aren’t ready for that level selflessness. However until you arrive at that level of purity you will suffer and attempt to get things from life and others that seem to have the promise of joy and happiness inside of them, but which instead postpone true fulfillment.

Any time you suffer it’s because you don’t get, see or experience what you want or because what you give isn’t received by others in the way that you want it to be, which again is not experiencing what you want and hence your agenda in giving.  When we don’t freely give we withhold and distort love and it feels really, really bad.  What this typically manifests as is us feeling bad, being in a bad mood, feeling frustration or stuck-ness, not having clarity, being confused, and feeling powerless or not seeing choice in the matter at hand.  These feelings and experiences are life telling you that you are withholding love, which is also withholding yourself because love is what you are. When you try to hold onto something, get something, or keep something you think you want you will distort the love that you are.  The result is impure motives, drives and lack of any true lasting fulfillment. 

LOVING IS GIVING 

Opening the heart

Loving is giving and giving is loving. They are the same.  It is not hard to give.  In fact giving is more natural than anything because it is your nature.  You don’t have to have some special skill set or come up with some fancy thing to give to others or life.  Your being is giving, and when you have purity and agenda-less-ness, giving is the natural result.  For a moment think about the times when you thought about saying something nice to someone or doing a kind act that you felt naturally inclined to do, but then you didn’t do it.  Maybe you weren’t sure how they would take it, or you didn’t want to seem like too much, or you doubted yourself and made your giving silly or stupid.  In this example what happened is that you become more concerned with yourself than you did about giving.  You made it about you, as you cared more how it was received and how you would be seen.  This withholding seems innocent enough and yet its laden with self-centeredness.  

Keep in mind is that giving is organic. Sometimes people will over-give in order to feel right, worthy, or validated.  This too is a distortion of love as they seek for ok-ness, approval, value and worth.  There will be energy expenditure and energy transfer that may create feelings of tiredness to your physical, emotional or mental bodies, but there should not be depletion of your being.  If you are feeling depleted it is an indication that you are out of balance and need to reassess what really serves.  Are you doing too much because you are focused or attached to an outcome and are therefore over-extending yourself?  Are you doing too little, withholding, not giving to others and therefore not bringing energy into your system through giving and thus feeling depleted?  You having a fuel tank of gas and taking care of your self-care is absolutely essential if you are going to be of service in giving to others.  The intention remains though that taking care of you is to give to others, not an end in of itself.  

In order to naturally give, to be giving in and of yourself, your heart must be open and available.  Giving is a lot of work, draining and effortful if your heart is not online.  Opening your heart is both the first and last step.  When tension or resistance is suspended or resolved you radiate, emanate and overflow.  The easiest and quickest path to resolution is forgiveness.  For-give-ness.  For in forgiveness you give again, you choose to open your heart, you choose to let go of what you think you want or need, how you were done wrong or did wrong, and all agenda for getting or being received in any particular way.  Energy can now freely exchange in and out of your system.  You hold onto nothing and hold back nothing.  There is nothing to lose and only the gift of being and sharing remains.  

The gift is the giving of your being just as you are.  When your heart is open it includes all inside of it, all beings, all others.  Care is inherent.  As you increase your dial on what you can give to others all of your needs, wants and desires will be taken care of.  That which is in alignment with you will be your experience.  There is no lack when we give, but rather natural overflowing abundance of giving and being.  

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado