EFFORTLESS STREAM OF GIVING
Giving to life
Giving often feels like effort. In fact most of us feel like we are giving all day long and find ourselves completely drained by the days end. Giving can come with activity, busyness and action, and there is no doubt that activity without periods of rest can deplete our systems. Yet there is a giving to life that happens even before action or activity occurs. A state of being of giving that is prior to anything that we physically or mentally do. In fact I’d suffice to say that much of our tiredness and depletion comes not from the activities themselves, but rather from not being in a state of giving while we go about doing our activities. Again it’s not to deny that we need both periods of activity and rest, however the place from which we come from makes all the difference.
So how do we find this effortless stream of giving? The good news is that we don’t have to go anywhere to find it because it lives right inside of us. We only need to tap into it so to speak. You’ve probably tapped into it before, but you likely didn’t know exactly what you were touching. You might have related the experience of tapping into the effortless stream of giving as feeling defeat. In fact the feeling of defeat is an entry point into the effortless stream of giving. Yet most people get lost in their story about what is happening and keep trying to make their experience match their desire rather than feel defeat. They keep banging away at attempting to make the appearance different rather than admitting defeat to the appearance. Hence why they get so damn tired. Hence why we are all so damn tired.
When you stop trying to make the operations and happenings of life be different, there is no other choice but to let them be. When you let them be as they are and participate with them as such, you stop forcing anything. When forcing stops, so does resistance, tiredness and efforting. If you’re constantly fighting the stream you are going to be expending a lot more energy and it’s going to feel like a lot more work than if you just went with it. However going with the stream will at times feel like defeat and you must be willing to feel this defeat. The beautiful thing about this, if you really get this, is that when you accept defeat you naturally open into giving. You can’t not give to your experience when you are no longer fighting it. When you allow what is to be how and what it is, you become the stream of giving organically. There is nothing extra that you need to do. It’s simply how it is when you are with life rather than at odds with it. You may still not like your experience, but you won’t be as tired and the need to check yourself out of life so that you can rest and recover will be less. You will start to find and feel rest inside of your experience, and here is where you are actually present, maybe for the first time ever.
STOP WISHING INTENSITY AWAY
Opportunities for being present
Sometimes life has to kind of beat us up a little bit before we are willing to accept defeat, so that we ultimately learn to live presently in full participation with the unfolding of life. When we are experiencing this “beating up” of sorts we often label it under the disguise of the word “intensity.” You’ve probably heard someone or maybe even yourself say, “wow things are really intense right now.” It’s a very popular spiritual thing to say. I hear that phrase many times a week. When people say this often they are wanting that experience of intensity to go away,. They are internally waiting, though they might not know they are waiting, until appearances and circumstances change so that they can feel lighter, better or less intensity. The energy of this inner dynamic feels like wanting whatever is happening to just be over with already, because once it’s over you think you feel better. Once the intensity is gone then you think you will be able to relax.
This is a trap. It’s a trap because life is full of intensity and if you are waiting or trying to force the situations of intensity to go away, you will find yourself doing this until the day your body dies, and maybe even beyond, who knows. Besides for it being a trap, when you wish your intensities to go away you rob yourself of incredibly potent opportunities for learning, which I call catalyst. This catalyst, or these moments of extra intensity, bring the gift of breaking us down. Why do we need to be broken down you ask? Bluntly stated because most of us are living in arrogant, self-centered ways and seeing through limited perspectives that have nothing to do with what is actually occurring. Most of these perspectives harm us or others rather than being helpful, yet they can be very convincing that they are trying to help. These sneaky arrogant, self-centered ways along with their limited perspectives need to be dismantled so that we can stop acting in opposition to the unfolding of life and rather move with it.
The little bit tricky thing about all of this is that we typically greatly identify with these parts and perspectives that need to be dismantled, so we tend to not let them go out without a fight. Hence the way of effort, force, resistance, which eventually results in tiredness and depletion that we may then lead to sickness, illness or adrenal fatigue. This then brings us to the dire need for intensity in our lives, because often intensity is our only hope in dismantling these ways of being and limited perspectives once and for all. Stopping wishing your intensities away. See them rather as an opportunity to open into the effortless stream of giving.
Breaking isn’t bad. What’s breaking is energetic architecture that isn’t serving us living fully present. Those structures need to break. If they don’t we stay trapped and wonder why our experience of life doesn’t change for the better. Even though many of us try to not feel the break of anything, breaking is natural. The journey of growth is deconstruction and reconstruction. If you aren’t regularly destructing then you probably aren’t growing much either. Don’t try to always make things “good”, let things be “bad” or intense at times. Even celebrate intensity if you can because within it is immense opportunity for something great to be born.
Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado