Dying to the self
There is no doubt, the energy of the heart is magic. Those who have tasted, felt or touched their heart know its power, its bliss and its vastness. It is the most advanced intelligence, and I would even say technology or tool, that we have access to inside of this human experience. When we find our heart we realize that everything that our mind or body has created or tries to create, pales in comparison to what and how the heart creates. Resting into the heart reveals a way of being, seeing and relating that includes everything and everyone inside of it. Nothing is left out and everything is loved. With this knowingness everything is possible.
If the heart is so powerful how come more of us don’t access and use it? Well my friends that is a good question. Why don’t we? The easiest answer I can give is because it means death of our ego. This means death of thinking that our minds know best, death of what we think we want, death of our life lived for own pleasures and preferences. Death, death, death. My friends we don’t like death. In fact as a society we pretend that death doesn’t exist. If we do acknowledge its existence our perspective of it is grim, depressing and full of sadness. Something that is so obvious and undeniably evident and yet we deny it, try to postpone it, hold on for dear life, that is until we simply can’t anymore. If we learned to allow things to die, if we gave everything it’s rights back to it’s natural course, including our wants, desires, dreams, ideas, perspectives, and so on, we would more easily find our heart. We would naturally find ourselves open to whatever is and in the field of infinite possibilities rather than finite completion. We would instantly reconnect to the magic.
Why death you ask? It is death of the individualistic, of the egocentric, of the self-centric focus, of which none of us escape. We are born innocent, without a self and in connection with our essence. Then we develop an ego in order to survive our world. The more our personality and identity develops the more we forget our original self. It is the natural course of human development. Without our ego mind we would have a very hard time adapting to or being part of this world. But the journey doesn’t stop there. There is development of our being which is beyond the mind, it’s simply that we have to give the reigns over and let something else be in charge. From the perspective of our human identity this feels like death. To our soul however it feels like coming home. It is a birth, yet to our mind’s ideas about what life is or should be, it feels like misery. We can either involuntarily collapse into suffering and feel victimized by the happenings of life, or we can voluntarily die to our stories, ideas, hopes and dreams and open into a world of wonder beyond where our mind’s imaginations lie.
WORLD OF WONDER
The voluntary choice to relinquish ourselves is what is called surrender. People like to think that surrender is easy and they use the term casually, but to truly surrender means that you will likely feel the pain of death. It means you are willingly opening into that pain which you’ve done your ultimate best to avoid acknowledging or feeling, and you are choosing to let die that which is ready to die.
So you’ve gone through the death portal, now what? Now you are open, available and you just are. Your heart is free. You are at peace. You’ve let the resentments, angers, insistences, pushes and pulls all go. You are simply available for exactly what is in front of you. You are no longer wishing that something else was. The longing for something different dies and you arrive into the present moment of what is here now. You feel humble and available. You don’t know any grand knowledge. You’ve just let the things go. They’re gone. Now life can move through you unimpeded. This is the beginning of the field of heart magic and the world of wonder and awe.
The more times you go through the death portal, the more you rest into this field. As you let things be as they are, more and more this field of wonder opens up to you. You might not be overtly aware of it at first. It may be more subtle and just beyond your ordinary resting awareness. You might notice an increase in synchronicities or being more telepathic, such as knowing when someone is going to call you or manifesting the best parking spot. You might feel less tense. Your breath might be easier and you feel less agitated or anxious in a general sense. Things seem to take a bit less effort and you feel less depleted. As you rest more and more into the field of the heart its presence is more obvious to you, and you begin to see and know the interconnectedness and inseparability of everything. More and more you see everything as one all pervasive, intelligent and sovereign love.
The field of heart magic is a collective or unified field. When you are rested in the heart, then other hearts will feel this and respond to it. They might not even know why they respond, they just do because all are connected at this level of the field. Even if people knowingly or unknowingly respond to it, they may still have doubts, insecurities, feel separate, and choose their mind’s ideas over this all loving love. Again giving up on our picture of life does not come easy. We typically need to experience some life disruption, pain or suffering to get us to even entertain surrender. If our life is too easy or comfortable there is nothing to push us into the next stage of development. We need some kind of catalyst. All of the catalyst you experience, the disruption, the pain, the suffering, the confusion is all to get you to your edge, to where you will willingly surrender, so that you can find your way into the heart. Next time you are experiencing some kind of distress, something that you don’t want to be feeling or experiencing, remember this is exactly what you need in order to help you open into the field of heart magic. Rather than turning away, face forward and move into whatever is presenting itself to you. Even if it doesn’t feel like it, it is a gift. Given to you by you, to help you remember your very nature, your most essential self, and your complete heart.
Dr. Amanda Love, Network Spinal Chiropractor, Boulder, Colorado