Using anger productively

Using anger productively  

Harnessing the power to transform

43775966 - angry bearded man screaming into the phonePeople use anger in a myriad of unproductive ways.  Those that express their anger unproductively use it to blame others for their problems, prove their rightness and feel in control.  People also repress their anger unproductively.  Doing this allows them to be insignificant, not take a stand for themselves or what they value and not be the authority in their lives.  Neither of these ways are healthy, nor do they harness the transformative power of anger.

One of the reasons why people don’t know how to work with their anger effectively is because it hasn’t been modeled in our culture.  We are taught that anger is bad or scary (so we repress it) or have learned that its what we need to do to manipulate a person/situation and be seen, heard and get our needs met (express unproductive).

The real purpose and power of anger is to use it to create standards for yourself and your life.  Lets say you are changing a story that you have about yourself that “you are not worthy”.  You declare a new story for yourself that now says “you are pure worth and love”.  In order to do this effectively you must first be fed up and pissed off enough that you’ve been dropping your standards on who you are up to this point.  It must become intolerable for you to entertain the story that you are not lovable.  If it is does not reach the level of intolerability you will sink back into old patterns.  Anger gives you the fuel to say, “no more, this is not good enough for me, I’m never going back.”

Permissioning & directing anger

Find your fuel

Anger does not need to be explosive to be impactful.  It does need to be direct, clear, unwavering and come from a place love for self and others.  Productive anger has the quality of being firm in what is being conveyed or upheld, and simultaneous soft in it coming from a deeply caring place of creating greater value for all involved.

People who have learned to repress their anger they can find it challenging to permission themselves to feel it.  Repressed anger can be masked in neutrality, boredom, niceness and uncertainty.  For these people, in finding their anger, they will often laugh when their anger arises to disperse their uncomfortableness with it.  People who have learned to express their anger unproductively find it difficult to soften and care about themselves and others in the midst of their outburst.  In directing their anger they will go into blame of self or others.

confident womanRegardless of how you have learned to deal with anger in the past the goal of productive anger is to help you be your own authority by moving through victimhood into empowerment.  From an empowered place you are the decision maker of what is right and wrong for you and you alone.  There is only your standards for your life and you are accountable to keep them.  It is moving through layers of conditioning about what you’ve been taught about how things work and who you are, to becoming the determiner, creator and master of your life.  Productive anger is key in this process of providing the fuel to transform the places you keep yourself small so that you can shine in your magnificence.  Using anger productively is fiercely loving yourself enough to care about your life.

Dr. Amanda Hessel, DC, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

Value yourself enough to take care of yourself

32552197 - preventive medicine financial condition self assessment concept.Value yourself enough to take care of yourself  

How to create change and make better choices

As shocking as this may sound, many people don’t care or value themselves.  When you don’t value yourself you make poor choices for your health and your life because you have an underlying belief that it (meaning you) doesn’t really matter anyways.

The fastest way to create change and improve the health of our nation is by getting people to care about themselves enough to take care of themselves. Making sure people know they have something of value to contribute by being alive, and that they are worthy & lovable. When people know their inherent worth and value, just watch how their health improves, how they make better choices that support their vitality and ability to contribute their gifts.

We currently live in a system that thinks medicating and numbing all of our uncomfortable sensations, feelings and thoughts will heal us, when indeed it is the exact opposite.  When we numb feeling all the “bad” things we think about ourselves and don’t get the opportunity to feel and disprove them as true.  They lurk in the background without any momentum available to create change.  You must feel it to heal it!  When you start allowing yourself to feel again you begin to realize things (meaning you) aren’t as bad as you originally thought they were.

handsmakingheartBenefits of self-love

Vibrant health

The benefits of self-love, value, and worth are no small thing.  If you want extraordinary health and an amazing life you must get this.  This is not new age fluff.  It is the real deal.  Love is the only thing that will heal you ever.  Period.

Think of a time when you first fell in love with someone.  Remember how amazing you felt.  Everything worked easier and better.  What happened in this state is that you allowed yourself to feel love as reflected to you from another.  The secret is you don’t need another person to permission yourself to feel this way, you can be your “other” when you see your value and inherent worth.

There is a basic fear in many of us that we are empty inside, that there is nothing special about us and that we have no gifts or talents.  We are constantly trying to improve ourselves, learn more things, get more degrees, so that we can prove to ourselves that there is something of value inside of us.  Society praises us for this, so our behaviors get reinforced.  The problem with this is that after attaining all of this knowledge/skill we still feel empty inside because we haven’t learned the most basic thing of all, which is that just through your mere presence alone you are everything.  You don’t need special training or skills for this one.  It is simply who you are.  You are the energy that animates your body and the universe.  That energy is love.  It is what/who you are.  When you know this you will feel silly ever having believed you were anything else.  Your body will heal, your emotions will lighten and your mind will become clear.

The core essence of my mission on this earth is help people remember who and what they are.  Nothing is more exciting to me then seeing another gain clarity, find their heart again and heal like crazy.

Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

Curing vs Healing

Restore yourself to a previous level of function or Reorganize into a higher level

People often confuse the terms and concepts of curing and healing.

Curing is getting rid of something that is causing you discomfort so that you can continue your life the way you were living before.  This is what most “healthcare” systems and providers have as their basic goal, to return you to a previous state of being.  This is disease care/symptom management rather then health care and wellness promotion.

Healing on the other hand has little to do with getting rid of something and instead is about creating greater wholeness and connection.  It looks beyond the surface of “something is wrong” and asks the question “what is really going on here?”.

Let’s take a curing example.  Say you are a runner and your knee hurts so you go to see your medical doctor because you feel something is not right.  They tell you that you can take “xxx” drug, do “yyy” exercise or have “zzz” procedure done in order to get rid of the pain so that you can keep running.  You decide to do “yyy” exercise and your knee feels better for a little while so you keep running (doing the same thing you’ve always done in the same way). 6 months later the pain is back and now you have to decide your next course of action to try and get rid of the pain and thus begin the cycle of chasing the symptom.

Now for the healing example.  You are the same runner in the above scenario but this time you decide to stop and take a bigger look at what is really going on here.  You love to run, you’ve been doing it for 10 years and you also realize that something needs to change as your body is telling you this loud and clear.  You decide to stop, listen and connect to your body/knee (instead of trying to get the pain sensation to go away).  In listening you realize that even though you love running you need change some things.  First you realize that running indoors instead of outdoors would support your knees on a physical level.  Secondly you also realize that you’ve been wanting to increase the intensity you run and decrease the distance, which you can easily track on a treadmill.  Lastly you realize that you want to be more social and relational in your life, so you join a gym.  6 months later you feel grateful for the changes you’ve made to support your needs (and knees), your running faster than you ever have before and you’ve made several new friends that have similar interests in fitness that you do.

Sometimes things need to change and we wouldn’t have previously made those connections until we stopped and listened to what our body is to communicating to us.  We often get so focused on wanting to do things the way we want to them (very limited focus) and don’t see that there may be better ways and options that include more aspects of ourselves and our life.

Dr. Amanda Hessel, DC

Also check out a short video on this concept

 

Beyond Pain into Ease, Growth & Bliss: The 3 Stages of Network Care

Network Spinal Analysis care is unique in its application and progression. It charts a very specific path that goes through stages as your body begins to change. It is not a “fix it up” technique, meaning, you are not necessarily “done” when you are no longer experiencing the original pain or discomfort which prompted you to seek out care in the first place. In fact “feeling better” or having “less pain” is often just the beginning of the process. It is pretty easy to help someone feel better in their body; many techniques and tools can do this. It is an entirely different process to help someone not only “feel better” but also expand their inner resourcefulness, create more efficient patterns in their body/life and help people reach higher stages of wholeness, growth and evolution.

Many people think that they just want to get out of pain, but the truth is pain is just a symptom of a bigger issue going on in life. What people really want is more freedom, joy, happiness, vitality, flexibility, presence, love, connection, authenticity and bliss in their lives. We often have the idea that if ‘this or that’ changes then we will experience those things, but that is not the case. While relief of pain, though temporarily feels amazing, if nothing in a person changes at a fundamental level then they will recreate those “painful feelings” in another way. This is actually a smart thing that our bodymindsoul does for us. It is our internal guidance mechanism of sorts that tells us to stop, pay attention and make a change. Life is try to get our attention and it will do it in a variety ways until we listen to it.

The 3 stages of Network Care walk people through this process in an embodied and sustainable way. I call the first stage Ease, the second Growth and the third Bliss.

Ease: Most of us are tense most of the time, whether we are aware of it or not. This can be bodily tension, emotional tension, mental tension and even spiritual tension. When we are tense we are not receptive to life. Instead we are inwardly resisting. The first step in the Network Care process is to create a state and eventually a stage of Ease in the body. I differentiate between a state change (which is temporary) and a stage change which is a sustainable state change. In the Ease stage your body moves from “Fight/Flight/Freeze” mode into “Rest/Relaxation/Openness” mode. This is vital if you are to move forward in life. Many people stop at this stage because they feel so much better when they have more ease. This is great, and there is more. For many they want more than just feeling better, they want greatness, limitlessness, to know their power and resourcefulness beyond what they have ever experienced before. That is when they are ready for the next stage which I call Growth.

Growth: The growth stage requires commitment, dedication, and passion for yourself and your life. You must value yourself to be in this stage. When you are ready to grow it requires that you change habits, patterns or behaviors. In order to create the change that you desire you must make that choice over and over and over again until it becomes your new pattern. This requires that you be more aware of yourself, catch yourself when you fall into old habits and patterns, and make a conscious choice of what you now desire to create for yourself in this moment. This is the stage of empowerment and consciously becoming the creator of your life. You take responsibility for and value how you feel, what you think and the actions you take. Feelings, thoughts and actions are no longer random occurrences but instead deliberate choices that you make in each moment. Network Care develops neural patterning that coincides with this level of conscious commitment to your life. Growth stage neural patterning allows for an empowered stage of consciousness to become your baseline foundation so that even when you find yourself in lower thought and feeling states you can more quickly and with greater ease reset to what state you want be in at that moment

Bliss: Ahh, yes, bliss, it is indeed a stage of Network Care. Who doesn’t want to experience more bliss? Bliss is complete agreement and alignment with all parts of yourself with all other parts of creation. It is a coming togetherness, community, connection, integration, or how I like to think of it – a soulgasm. It is a stage beyond the mind, but the mind can be informed from Bliss; meaning you can live an integration of this stage in embodied form. It is the stage most often striven for, especially in spiritual communities, but you don’t have to be “spiritual” to want to live in more bliss and joy in your life. Most people have only felt temporary bliss state changes. These are common when you hear something inspirational or you have an encounter with a spiritual teacher. People often associate those experiences as being created by an “outside” force, person or presence and therefore they can’t create the stage change in their life. This occurs because people jump from Ease right into Bliss without going through the Growth stage. It is entirely possibly and quite easy to do this, however it does not create a sustainable shift in your life. This is because you don’t yet realize your power and who you are, which you develop in the Growth stage. You subsequently disown or project your power to create bliss on an outside figure/force. When instead you go through each stage you can sustainably be in any stage of your choosing. The Bliss stage requires advanced communication in your nervous system. Network Care upgrades the neurological software that connects the heart to the brain in the Bliss stage. This means your heart informs your brain more and more and you make choices in your life with your heart leading and head following

It is my joy to facilitate this process with/in others. To create Ease in the body, support people as they wake up to their power and simultaneously upgrading the neurological “software” and communication in the body so that higher level consciousness states can more easily be sustained in a person’s life. I have the honor to watch people move from pain, suffering, and disconnection into their empowered self who is living the life that they want to be living in joy, love, grace and gratitude. Please ask me how I might be able to support and serve you in this process

Dr. Amanda Hessel, DC, MS, L.Ac