CLEAR YOUR SH*T OUT
Be a vessel for source
We all have shit. Lots and lots of shit. We are full of it. Most are solely consumed in it and don’t even know it. It is the source of our dissatisfaction, our disempowerment and our suffering. So what is all of this shit and where does it come from? It is all of the stories, beliefs, opinions, ideas, judgments, and everything we think we know about stuff and life. Essentially it’s everything we make up about who we think we are, what life is and the rightness or wrongness of what’s happened or is currently happening to us or in the world. The source of all of our shit is our own thoughts and beliefs about stuff and the societal conditioning and norms that we learn from others and take on as our own. We are often extremely convicted in our shit. It gives us a sense of personal individual identity. To let go of it means that we have to admit defeat to the fact that we actually don’t know and accept that which often feels unacceptable to us. For many this is a tall order and most would rather keep their experience of dissatisfaction, disempowerment and suffering than dismantle their personal ego.
Outside of the obvious, and perhaps it’s all obvious, you may wonder why anyone would want to clear out their shit and give away everything they think they know about life. Well besides knowing your power, feeling fulfilled and ending suffering for yourself, it is also the gateway to being a vessel for source and living joyfully in levity and service. When we empty out all of the shit inside of us, our mind and body become a clear container for life to be as it and move through us in the most precise, gracious and graceful ways. It is only from this state of emptiness of self that we can truly be of service to others and life without any personal agenda whatsoever. It is a state of true allowance and a giving to, rather than attempting to get anything at all to happen or be any way other than it is. To our minds this might feel or seem like lack of progress or forward momentum, but to all of our souls it’s a welcome home.
All progress is to get to better or get to perfection, but when you accept that as the current state then all of the sudden there is no where to get. You’ve instantly arrived where you have been trying to get. Again most people’s minds will fight this tooth and nail because it means that whatever you’ve thought about something, some injustice you feel you’ve seen or experienced, something you’ve perceived as not right, must be forgiven and allowed to return to its natural state of wholeness within your mind. Our minds experience this as failure and yet paradoxically we become more free and in connection with all of life when we stop fighting. This is healing, and beyond that, this is healed.
THE JOY OF BEING A VESSEL
There is tremendous joy in surrendering to what is and becoming an empty vessel of pure service. To give your life over to that sourceful intelligence that created the entire universe, that put galaxies in place and planets into orbit, which sees and knows way beyond what the human mind does, relieves so much pressure on your system. For some this might not seem all that exciting on initial thought. To give away our agendas of all the things we think we want, that feel important to us, and simply be moved by the source of life itself can feel scary to the mind. We may feel loss of control. We might have thoughts that we will be purposeless if we don’t have a clear trajectory of what is next. We often fear the quiet, the silence or non-activity because it seems to threaten our worth and sense of contribution, safety or survival. Most people lack trust in the silence so they fill up the spaciousness of their mind with as many thoughts as possible about everything that has happened, is happening or might happen. In this way we can’t hear in the silence, and feeling nothing is there, we busy ourselves as much as they can so that we don’t feel the uncomfortableness of the fertile spontaneous present arising of the mystery of silence.
Much to your surprise you might discover that on an appearance level your life doesn’t look that much different when you give away all the stuff inside of you that keeps you full of your own self. You may live in the same place, have the same job, be engaged in the same relationships, yet even though things look the same on the outside, where you are coming from on the inside is completely different. Coming from your current thoughts and beliefs about stuff versus coming from pure emptiness that remains when you give away all of that stuff, generates a completely different experience even it looks the same from the outside. The level of presence, connection, ease, purity, depth of impact and non-attachment you feel is worlds different than what most people are experiencing inside of their minds in their day to day experience.
There really is nothing greater that I’ve found than giving away the personal mind stuff and being open to whatever is present. To be available in this way allows you to feel rested inside of every single moment. There is no time or place where you need to leave this rest to go outside of yourself and meet something other than you. All of you is included inside of the moment when you drop all of your ideas, thoughts and agendas about what’s happened or is happening. Here you experience magic in action, because your mind doesn’t have it figured out yet, but somehow that which knows all moves through you. What comes through is stuff you wouldn’t have even been able to figure out or make up. You know, but don’t know how you know. You do, but don’t really know what you are doing. Yet eternal yumminess is all you ever experience no matter how things unfold and you realize your tiny little person mind could never take credit for it all. This is mastery of the yourself to the point where you are willing to surrender yourself completely to all of you rather than just what you think you are. This brings an indescribable peace to your experience because you no longer have any personal attachment to anything that happens, and paradoxically in giving yourself away you finally experience the freedom you’ve always innately longed for.
Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado