WHAT DO YOU SERVE?

WHAT DO YOU SERVE?

Living devoted

So much of our lives we live on automatic pilot.  We go through the motions of our days without much thought as to why we are doing what we are doing.  We simply do the things we think we need to do in order to make life happen.  By the end of our day we only hope that we got everything done just to wake up and do it all over again.  In this way we aren’t living intentionally, but rather only to survive.  While this is valid, it doesn’t do much for us in terms of feeling soulfully aligned, fulfilled and like we are completing the mission for our existence.  Instead we feel like we are on a treadmill that we can’t get off of because the stuff of life doesn’t stop happening.  Eventually we get tired, then exhausted, yet we continue to focus on the stuff of life rather than on why we even exist in the first place.

What we serve is what we focus our time, energy and attention on.  Most of us have aspirations to serve something great.  Examples of something great would be serving love, joy, freedom, truth, peace, or unity.  While many of us might have the aim to serve these things, what most of us end up of serving is our to do list, our emotional states, our frustrations, our limitations, our judgments, our preferences, and our pleasures or comforts.  We make these things primary in our life rather than what it is we say or think we desire to make primary or serve.  For example say we feel frustrated about something.  We tend to focus our energy on the state of being frustrated and what we are frustrated about, rather than on being or feeling peace, which is what we might ideally like to think that we serve.  Or say we have 30 things on our to do list for the day and feel overwhelmed.  We then keep our feelings of overwhelm in the forefront, rather than focusing on joy.  One more example is that we might lose ourselves inside of pleasurable sensations or comfort that may actually be limiting, rather than conjuring up the energy to focus on freedom.  

In order to live intentionally devoted to what it is you consciously want to serve requires that you give away your own personal life with all of your preferences and the ways you think/want life to be.  99%, or maybe even 100% of our frustrations have to do with life not looking, feeling or being the way we want it to look, feel or be.  However if it is no longer about us, but only about what we serve, it cuts out all the b.s. and confusion.  Life becomes very uncomplicated when it is no longer about all of your personal preferences and desires being met, but rather it’s about the reason why you exist, which for most people is lives along the lines of serving love, joy, freedom, truth, peace, or unity, and helping others know or experience this too. 

GIVING AWAY YOUR SELF

Moving beyond self-indulgence

In order to move beyond our constant self-indulgence in our own preferences, needs, wants, desires, emotional states and thoughts, something has to be even more important than us.  This isn’t to dismiss our own inherent value or worth, but rather to make it not so important.  There is a development move, stage or step so to speak, from making your self value important, to simply accepting it and understanding that it is.  See the paradox is that when we understand, know and accept our own inherent value or worth, all of our own “stuff” doesn’t really take up space inside of us anymore.  We don’t need to focus on ourselves.  This frees up our internal space to align with our mission, why we exist, and serving that which we desire to serve rather than our own little personal world stuff.  

Some people might call this ego death, but it really isn’t as dramatic as spiritual people tend to make it out to be.  It’s just a shift in focus.  That focus is from your personal life and all of its details and perceived demands being central, to making what you serve to be central.  It’s also easy to know your purpose, mission or what you really want to serve.  It’s not something that you do or even what you are doing now, but rather it’s what you want people to get by your existence.  It’s what you would want everyone in the world to know if you died tomorrow.  You can ask yourself the question, “If I died tomorrow what would I want every child, woman, man, animal, etc. to know, experience or feel?”  What imprint, information or feeling do you want every person that you interact with to get from you?  What quality or energetic vibration do you desire that everything in creation experiences?  What kind of world do you want to live in?  You must be what you want yourself and others to experience.  

In giving away yourself you might be a little cranky and put up a bit of fight.  You might feel sad or like a death of sorts, as the focus on your personal dreams perishes.  However you will open into something more magnificent that it will be easy to forget your crankiness.  Be clear though that what you open up into is not finally getting what you want, which is often what people think is the spiritual reward for surrendering the self.  Rather you open into the larger mission of which you are a part of and for which there is so much more support for, than whatever it is you are trying to do on your own, but again it’s not about you.  One more time be clear this is not a recipe for things happening how you prefer them to happen.  There will still be hard work and showing up, probably way more than you currently do.  It also doesn’t mean that your body changes, sensations go away, or that situations or people in your life change.  Those things might happen, but this isn’t about them happening.  It’s only about you aligning with why you exist and opening yourself to serve that.  While you still may not have what you want, living aligned and serving what you desire to serve is actually a 1000 times more rewarding than serving yourself, and a bit relieving because it’s finally not about you.  

There is a choice to make and it’s one that you must consciously choose, and continue to choose over and over again until you’ve got it.  That choice is what you serve.  This is what you focus on, what you tune your self to, what you put in the forefront over anything that appears in your experience.  That choice creates a developmental shift from what we might call a pseudo self-empowerment into the dissolution of self, and thus self-importance.  Said another way it’s simply growing up.  While it’s an important development step to become a self, it’s also important to realize that you’re not.

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

THOUGHT INDUCED COMA

THOUGHT INDUCED COMA

Snapping yourself out of it

Sometimes we feel stuck, bored and tired.  We want to feel purposeful, excited and productive, but rather we are looped in our habitual ways of being and doing.  The mundane quality of everyday life is taking up the front and center space of our awareness.  We search for a way out of our misery of the ordinary, hoping to find some shiny object, thing or person that will re-inspire life in us.  Only to experience the fleetingness of the shiny object, or coming up empty handed altogether.  It seems as though all we can do is let these feelings of lack of inspiration pass in their own timing and rhythm.  It seems as though our only choice is to keep feeling stuck, bored, tired and kind of miserable.  

What is really happening in these moments or rhythms of our life?  What it boils down to is that we are out of alignment with ourselves.  This could be said lots of ways.  We are not present, we are not in gratitude, we are seeing through the perspective of lack, we are disconnected, we are checked out, we are focused on appearance rather than essence, and on and on.  You get the point.  When this is our general disposition then nothing is exciting and we’d rather be somewhere other than where we are.  In this state of being we tend think/believe that happiness is somewhere else.  That joy, love and peace is somewhere else.  That what we want is somewhere else.  This mysterious, magical, fantastical somewhere else lives nowhere other than in the thoughts of our minds.  While it’s lovely to fantasize, it keeps us in our head and does little to bring us into now.  Now is the only place that anything is happening.  Now is the place where we feel alive.  Now is the place of lived reality-fantasy instead of thought fantasy.  Again while thinking about things is nice, it doesn’t lead to presence, it only leads to more thoughts.  

We need to snap ourselves out of our thought induced comas and come back to what is happening now.  We must ask ourselves why we are choosing to be asleep during our day?  Why are we attempting to get certain things over or finished?  Maybe it’s that we don’t like certain activities. Why is that?  How can you make them more enjoyable if you are not enjoying them? Maybe certain things feel like they aren’t working or responding to you as you would like them too.  Where is your focus in that moment?  Is it on getting something or trying to make something happen, which by the way are the same thing.  Can you reorient to giving rather than getting?  I mean really giving which has absolutely nothing to do with what you will get in return. Do you need to make changes in your life to make it work better, but you refuse to change and therefore choose to be stuck, bored and tired instead?  Do you fail to see and therefore have gratitude for what is in front of your eyes because you desire the picture to be different?   

SERVE WHAT’S HERE 

Becoming present

In general our lives are pretty good.  Probably most people reading this article are neither starving or homeless.  Your basic needs are met and you are even likely doing some things in the world that feel like they are contributing to something beyond your own personal selves.  Most here also have some level of self-awareness, impact on others, and personal and spiritual development.  This puts us in a prime position to really hone our alignment and be of service no matter what is occurring.  I’ve said this before, but I will say it again, being of service is not about martyrdom or self-denial.  It is about being yourself and having the desire to give to others.  Once all of your basic bodily human needs are met and your personal and social connection needs are met, there really isn’t much left to do but be of service in some way.  If you aren’t then you tend to feel stagnant, bored and slightly miserable.  

Now you might find yourself perseverating on a few things you want, but still don’t have.  If you perseverate long enough then that focus might overwhelm your desire to serve because service is not about getting anything.  Not even the things you think you really want badly or the things you think you need in order to be of service.  There is never anything you need to be of service except the desire to serve.  One thing I can promise is that being of service is 1,000 times more fulfilling than getting those last few things you think you really want like a partner, a house or having the next big project or breakthrough happen.  Also being of service has nothing to do with your job or work, but rather it’s about what you give to everything you do.  

Next time you find yourself bored, tired, stuck, or slightly miserable, wishing you were somewhere else or in some other moment in time where things were different or you felt differently, I invite you to do this one thing.  Internally ask yourself the question, “how can I serve this?” or “how can I be of service here?”  It’s simple, like most things I recommend, but incredibly effective at getting you to shift out of your habitual, asleep, mundane reality and into the present moment.  Even though you might not feel completely shifted, you are beginning to shift.  You are shifting out of seeing what your mind thinks it’s seeing from its past experiences and memory banks, into the actual aliveness of what is always the present moment.  Understand nothing is ever mundane or the same as it was yesterday or even 5 minutes ago.  It’s only your thoughts recreating the same images, thoughts and ideas, which gives the appearance of sameness.  

To be of service you must be present.  It is the only way you can attune or be in rhythm with the unfolding dance of life.  Rather than believing that you must get somewhere else first before you can serve, recognize and serve what is already here.  After all there is nothing else.  Even if what’s here is not your preference, find your way into the state of being of service.  If you do you will snap yourself out of your thought coma and find aliveness.  You will start participating with life rather than thinking about it.  You will quit caring so much about all the things and experiences you think you want.  You will feel more love and gratitude as your ever present state of being.  

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

SERIOUSLY PLAYING

SERIOUSLY PLAYING 

End of trying to get things done

Most people desire to enjoy life and have fun, yet most people are not enjoying life or having fun.  Yes perhaps people occasionally permission themselves to play on the weekends or to take a vacation, but few people play all day long.  Rather people are quite serious and methodical in their day to day operations and routines.  Where did we learn this methodically serious attitude about life?  Even more importantly how are you operating inside certain boxes, containers and ideas that keep you from enjoying your life fully?

The human mind is funny.  It thinks it wants certain things and so it gets you to work seriously hard in order to get or achieve those things.  When I say things I am not only talking about material things, but including all relational and spiritual aspirations as well.  There is often a general undercurrent in our psyche that runs the program that we must get things done or that we need to get something or get somewhere so that we can be happy, relax and enjoy ourselves.  This mindset keeps us somewhat constricted, limited and inside of a box of what we think we want our lives to look like in order for us to be really joyful.  There is also often some fear that if we enjoy ourselves now before we get the thing or arrive at the place that we desire that we won’t get the thing or arrive where we think we want too.  So we postpone the joy until we achieve or arrive.  This is incredibly common and I would bet most of you do this several times in any given day.  

The place where we learned that seriousness goes along with getting things done is an interesting place indeed.  We tend to think the more serious we take something means the more we care about it, and therefore the higher likelihood that we will achieve the outcome of our desire.  It probably rarely, if ever, crosses your mind to ask yourself the question, how could I play harder in order to achieve the outcome that I desire.  This question contradicts everything we have ever learned about accomplishment and achievement.  

The first thing to really understand is that its not ever ever ever the outcome that brings us the joy, happiness, rest or the resolution we think it will bring us. Instead it is us that brings the joy to the outcome.  So why not have the joy now, bring the joy now to what it is you are engaged in and with rather than waiting on the outcome to come into fruition.  It can be a long wait.  Sometimes you will wait your entire life.  Would you want to wait your entire life in order to experience the joy and happiness that you desire now?  Many people do because they don’t see any other choice.  They don’t see that than can create, permission and generate what they desire to feel right here, right now regardless of what is here inside of their experience.   

WHY PLAY? 

You radiate & serve in play

Some people rather enjoy being serious, which is perfect.  If there is enjoyment in the seriousness than there is play even if it looks serious.  However what I see more often than not is that seriousness is part of people’s personas and who they think they need to be rather than what they naturally desire to be or are.  Let’s take the one who is on a healing path or a spiritual seeker for example.  Often people are very serious about their healing journey and their path to self-realization or enlightenment.  They take all the courses, go to all the workshops, do all the programs and journeys, and see all of their practitioners and healers, yet they continue to month after month, year after year, not enjoy themselves or their life.  They feel like the have to keep working hard and that they are never going to arrive fully healed or self-realized.  They keep trying to get somewhere and keep coming up short.  They see failure and feel like the path has no end in sight so they get more serious about it, thinking that will be the ticket.

You might wonder, why isn’t that the ticket?  I mean doesn’t that mean I care and am committed because I keep showing up.  To some degree yes it does show desire and care, but the attitude or disposition from where you come from inside your seeking is of prime importance.  It makes all the difference in the world.  If your attitude is one of trying to get it over or figure it out than you’ve already lost.  There is no where to get and so you won’t ever arrive.  You can’t “arrive” until you realize that there is no where to get.  Get that.  The journey is the destination.  There isn’t an actual destination different from it.  Even if you get what you want, accomplish or achieve your goals, become healed or self-realized, get the relationship or thing that you want, that doesn’t mean you have arrived at any destination.  It simply means your mind has a check box that it can check off, that’s it.  

Why play then?  Play brings with it lightness, levity, and joy.  When you play, even if there is work and effort, its fun.  You are not attached when you play.  You create and dismantle without so much as a thought.  There is no thinking of when the moment will be over and done, instead you are present.  When you play you abundantly radiate and naturally overflow.  This abundant, radiating, overflowing yumminess is service.  You serve by being joyfully.  You can’t not help it.  It is a natural side effect.  You don’t have to figure out what to do, how to serve or what your purpose is because you are being your purpose.  

Since this is what most people actually desire you must ask yourself the question as to what you are waiting for and be willing to stop waiting.  Realize that it is not in the arriving or getting that you experience the joy of being.  You are the source of joyful being.  You are the chooser of your state of being.  You choose joy or not joy.  You therefore choose to serve through sharing your natural radiating self or to not serve.  You get to decide if you want to feel good now or if you want to postpone it until you get something you think you want or check a box off of your to do list.  Joy can sometimes feel like worlds away, but its not.  Its right here.  You simply need to choose it.  

Dr. Amanda Love, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado