STOP COMPROMISING
Overcoming fear of lack
It seems as though our lives are one compromise after another. We take what we can get because we fear we can’t get better. We are afraid that what we really want doesn’t exist, can’t find us or that we don’t deserve it. So we compromise on what our heart really wants and live a life that feels less full then we would like it to feel. Staying the course for what we want takes commitment and devotion to our vision, which is really just commitment and devotion to ourselves. This all requires that we recognize our innate value, that we matter, and that what we want matters. Without this we settle for less than our desire and just get through our days. We live without integrity to ourselves and feel out of alignment in our bodies and lives, and innocently and cluelessly we wonder why.
When I say don’t compromise what I am talking about here are things that matter, like really matter to you. Where you live, who you want to partner with, your health and food choices, your perspectives and thought patterns, the work you do in the world, the people you hire to work with you, the big stuff. If one night your partner wants to eat Mexican and you want Italian, it’s ok to choose what your partner wants. Mexican food may not be what your belly is really feeling, but your whole life alignment is not going to be off if you eat Mexican rather than Italian for a night. You get what I mean. Be flexible in the things that aren’t really a big deal as to not be rigid, but don’t compromise on the things that really matter to your larger overarching life experience. To do so is to underestimate your worth and undervalue what it is you are here to experience, give and receive.
The number one reason we compromise is that we are afraid to be alone or not supported. We fear that if we don’t compromise then there will be nothing else present to take the place of the thing that we are saying no to. This brings up another good point, which is that we must say “no not this” when something doesn’t work for us. Saying no is not easy for those who are more concerned with pleasing others than they are being true to themselves. Pleasing others gives us a sense of ok-ness, because if we are liked then we feel supported and loved, but that support and love is conditional on the other person or thing being happy with you. This is a self-distorting game that all of us have played in some form or another and it leads only to inner agony and resistance. To distort or tort ourselves is to create tension, bind and wind ourselves up in ways so that we aren’t being who we are. With more and more torsion and twisting of ourselves we don’t even know who we are anymore or what we feel inside. At the extreme we lose touch with our authentic self. It’s like nobody is home inside of our body and we perform as this person that we think people want us to be. All the while having no clue who we are inside.
WORTH & VALUE
Remember yourself
It’s time to be done with the game of not loving and being who you are. Even despite all of the twisting you do in order to not be you, in the end you can only be you. Who you are is enough, complete, worthy and full. Nothing is lacking about who you are as a being. When you go beyond “knowing” this to be true and really get THAT it’s true you will never compromise on anything that is really important to you again. The reason that most everyone having a human experience feels like they are unworthy is because they’ve forgotten what they are. You are not flesh and bones. You are spirit. You are the breath that gives life. You are eternal. You are having a flesh and bones experience. Just like when you were a kid and you went for a ride a rollercoaster, you weren’t THE rollercoaster, you were the one who experienced the rollercoaster. Same is true for your body and this human experience. You are the experiencer, not the forms of experience.
Why do we forget what we are? So that we can rediscover ourselves from another perspective. In the appropriate and relevant timing you will come to remember more of what you are. However when you compromise you move further away from remembering and being yourself. Through choosing to not compromise anymore you claim stake in your value. This moves the inner dial closer to home. Home being a remembrance of the totality of your being. Yes all of this can happen and be a lived reality for you. You can live knowing your worth, saying no when needed, being in integrity with what you actually want, move through all your fears of being unsupported or unloved, and devote to yourself to your heart’s call.
Through this inner transformation you will see that nothing is inherently better or more than anything else. No being is better than another. We are all the same in beingness. We may have each developed different skills and abilities, but all are the same one spirit expressing itself in an infinite multitude of ways. There is no lack or scarcity. There is only fullness and completeness. When we shift our perspective our reality follows suit. We only see and experience scarcity because we create that perspective inside of us. If we didn’t create it, then the experience of it would end and we would have the experience of always having what we needed. We would know that if not this thing or that person, then something else will present itself. We would be convicted in knowing that nothing can be other than whole and if something didn’t resonate with us we wouldn’t try to make it fit. We would just let it go knowing that something else WILL fit because it can’t not in a complete universe.
You want what you want for a reason. Your desires are the arrows showing you the path. If something doesn’t feel quite right, then let it go. That’s your inner guidance speaking. Don’t override it. You know for you better than anything or anyone else does. Be resourceful and find something else. It’s ok to feel disappointed when something doesn’t turn out how you want it to, but don’t stay there too long, as if you do you are postponing the next thing from presenting itself to you.
Dr. Amanda Love, Network Spinal Analysis, Light Touch & Energetic Chiropractor, Boulder, Colorado
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