Why stress keeps hijacking you
How to stop perceiving stress & free yourself
What would your life be like if you stopped perceiving stress? If you woke up today and said “I’m going to stop viewing anything in life as stressful”? Sounds pretty damn liberating, eh? So why do we continue to choose to perceive stress over and over and over again? Well, hold onto your seat, I’m about to let the cat😸 out of the bag…
The basic reason we perceive stress (aka fear) is because we believe in wrongness and lack. Pick one thing, anything, that you perceive as stressful and put it in the forefront of your mind right now. It could be the pressure of a deadline for work, the state of your health or a symptom in your body, a disagreement with a friend or spouse, a feeling of responsibility for someone else or a concern about your financial state. In whatever situation you are currently thinking about notice what you think might not “go right”, be lacking in presence or that there will not be enough of. In the examples of above they would be lack of time, health, relationship, resources or money.
When we go into “stress mode” we separate ourselves off from the larger rhythms of life, create a personal bubble, thinking we have to figure it all out on our own. We also believe that there is potential for failure, screwing things up or things going horribly wrong. Its enough to make us stop breathing, feel frozen or stuck and go into ultra control mode making sure nothing slips through the cracks. Most people live like this every day.
Moving from stress to “ok-ness”
Finding your inner source of stability
Finding your inner source of stability comes from embodying and knowing that no matter what you will be ok. This is where safety to move forward, make new choices and live fully comes from. You must know, feel (not just think) and accept yourself and life no matter what choices you make or don’t make. You must quit judging yourself and life as “good-bad, right-wrong, this or that”. You must be willing to change your perspective of wrongness to one of perfection, even if things don’t look like you want them too. This will activate and stretch the muscle of “ok-ness” inside of yourself. You will begin to relinquish control.
Tell life your preference. Tell it what you want. Show up for what you want. Then let it go. Release your mental constraint and concept of what you think it then has to look like. Instead know that whatever then shows up in your life is exactly what you have been telling life you want. Even if your mind cannot connect the dots of how when you asked for a Porsche you got a Ford, or when you asked for better health you got another ailment, learn to trust the process more than receiving the outcome you think you should be having.
We often hold ourselves or others hostage to life instead of living free by requiring that life looks a certain way. The result of that is fear, scarcity, overwhelm, breakdown, strangulation, efforting, heaviness, seriousness and plain old not fun. You will also feel on edge, not trusting and will not feel safe; safe to be in a body, safe to move forward or make changes, safe to be in relationship, safe to live your life. The current of doubt and fear will submerse you under its tide, trapping you in the smallest version of yourself that’s possible.
The good news it that there is a choice that you can begin making today, and that is knowing no matter what you are ok & no matter what accepting yourself for whoever you think you are and whatever you do, have done or not done. Feel this, believe this and start to know it. I freaking promise you that you will develop your inner source of stability/ok-ness, stop perceiving stress (thus stop protecting yourself) and liberate yourself and the rest of life. I encourage you trample any thoughts or beliefs that may get in your way and to be brave enough to be in this much service to humanity.
Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Tomato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado