Giving Everything Back to Source

Giving Everything Back to Source 

Tendency to hold on

Studio shot of worried and upset caucasian woman holding hands in pray near chin, squeezing it tight and begging for something, smiling nervously and standing with closed eyes over gray backgroundAs human beings we tend to hold onto everything.  This perpetual holding on gives us a sense of security and like we can somehow manipulate our external reality if we just hold on a little bit tighter.  Holding on is our attempt to control the spontaneous, unpredictability of life so that we are not caught too far off our guard where we perceive that things might get or go “bad”.  This holding onto life keeps our life looking a particular way and provides us with the illusionary experience of consistency and sameness.  While a part of us feels better when this illusionary experience of life appears to be intact, another part of us feels stifled and like it can’t breathe inside of delusion we are perpetuating.  

We not only hold onto material things like homes, jobs, relationships and such, we also hold onto thoughts.  In fact we are almost never entirely without a thought.  For many people to open into the spacious, emptiness beyond thought is terrifying.  I believe that most have never done it for much longer than a second or two, if even that, which means that we are always holding onto something.  Why the terror to let go you may ask?  Perhaps we fear that this world that we live in now, with all the things that we know, will disappear.  Perhaps the tastes we’ve had of freedom have felt “too free” and we prefer some constraint and limitation over our freedom.  Maybe we’ve created the story that we don’t know how to let go, or maybe we don’t even know that we are holding life in the grips of our own mind.  

Regardless of our reasoning or our lack of awareness into ourselves as to our patterns of holding the result of holding is the same.  Holding on always creates some level of tension in our body-mind.  That tension then becomes the filter with which we interpret and experience everything and with which we come to believe what is.  Tension patterns also create disconnection from source or from the larger organizing principle of creation.  This is the inherent function of tension patterns, to be self-protective of this individuated body-mind organism that we call ourselves, and yet simultaneous with this comes reinforcement of the illusion of perceiving yourself as separate from the rest of creation.   

Reconnecting with Source 

Its easier than your mind thinks

Happy girl jumpingRe-establishing connection to source is always easier than our mind thinks that it is.  It is the job of our mind to make things way more complicated than they are in actuality.  People’s minds like to talk about how they have to do this or that, change this or that, or how they just have to surrender and let go already.  Yet for most this simply stays in their mind as another thought or idea that takes up space inside of the infinite spaciousness of ourselves.  I find if people are talking about their need to surrender and let go they are quite far from actually doing it.  Why does letting go or surrendering stay in the mind rather than become our direct experience?   It is because ultimately we don’t really want to let go of what we say we want to let go of.  We prefer our uncomfortable (or unnoticeable for some that have less awareness of themselves) tension patterns and delusional stories of reality over ease and truth because more than anything else we fear what we might lose.  

So fear of loss runs the show of our lives until we boldly and courageously decide to no longer let it.  Not until we are willing to lose everything can we truly experience surrender.  Few people arrive here without exhausting every other possible route first.  We quite literally exhaust ourselves into the truth.  Our beliefs in scarcity, lack, and wrongness, that we won’t have enough, be enough, achieve the right things, things won’t last or turn out, that we’ve failed, will be alone,  etc… triumphs.  

How do we walk this path towards surrender step by step?  I have found that to give everything back to source is the quickest route.  This means making the commitment to first tune into yourself and develop awareness of your patterns of tension and disconnection.  As tension patterns arise at the body level immediately release them.  Don’t try to figure them out or process them at length, simply just drop the tension.  Rather than continue to hold on to it, let it go, just like that.  You will notice instantly more ease and breath in your body.  You will also begin to realize just how powerful you are and how you are the creator of your own tension patterns.  Second is the willingness to let go of your thoughts as they arise.  This will take consistent practice for most.  If you get fixated on a thought recognize the fixation and then let the thought go.  This is important particularly for thoughts that really grab you and bring you into a less resourced and often fearful state.  

As you do this more and more you will be developing your skill set in giving back to source rather than taking from or holding on as if nothing else will ever come your way.  Whenever we give back we are instantaneously rewarded with more energy and aliveness.  What we hold onto we maintain.  At best our energy state stays neutral which means life looks the same and feels mundane most of the time.  However what we give back to life, to source, frees us up and thus we become available to exponentially greater and greater states of energy.  This also means that we almost never know what will happen.  We are in the moment of ever present aliveness, trust, and knowingness in the perfection of it all.  This is what at our heart of hearts we all desire and seek no matter how much our minds want to interfere.  

Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

Finding your Power

Finding your Power 

Moving beyond fear & accepting uncertainty

colorful color splash paintbrush rowWhen people perceive uncertainty fear often strikes.  The key here is perceive.  The truth is uncertainty is the perpetual state that we live in moment to moment.  Nothing is known until the moment that it is experienced and lived.  In this way we are always looking onto a blank canvas and waiting for the next stroke to appear.  What we frequently don’t realize is that we are the artist.  We are the one drawing each stroke and our perception is how we draw.  What we perceive is the picture of life we paint ourselves.  

It is in this way people are not living in the same reality.  There may be the surface appearance that we are all living in the same world, meaning we both see the same objects, and yet how people are experiencing this surface reality of objects is radically different.  It is truly in this way that you are the master-creator of your reality.  It is no joke or just new age spiritual nonsense that you are in charge, you actually are.

So the question becomes why then are we living so disempowered?  Why is it so hard for us to see, know and taste our power?  It is because the veil or covering of fear clouds our awareness and thus only allows us to perceive through its lens.  When fear is our lens we see/perceive threat.  Fear reinforces the idea of separation and promotes self-protection.  Fear is lack of faith and lack of trust.  It’s constantly doubting and questioning because it feels scared and alone.  This is the miserable state of being that most people are living in most of the time.  Know that ultimately fear is just one state of being from which you can choose, yet our tendency is to default to this program of fear whenever we perceive uncertainty.

On a lighter note this state of being of fear is what most of us came here to see through and overcome in order to help bring forth new possibilities of a reality that is lighter, rested, and more joyful for those that are ready for it.  Understand that not everyone is ready for a new reality and that is ok.  Sometimes holding onto patterns of fear are our only known way to create a sense of stability for ourselves.  The desire to hold onto the external sense of stability, as wavering and unstable as it is, outweighs accepting the truth of uncertainty.  However through accepting the truth of uncertainty you allow yourself to rest into it rather than fight it.  The relinquishment of your own inner resistance to uncertainty is what propels you into your power where you find true stability.  Stability in your own beingness that is independent of any circumstance, situation or condition.   

Changing your programming 

Being in the Driver’s seat

Hacker using the Internet hacked abstract computer server, databHow is it then that we change our default response?  How do we reprogram ourselves to a new patterned way of perceiving?  I wish I could give you some elaborately beautiful answer, but Nike said it best with their slogan just do it.  Understand that when we aren’t ready to change, change will seem really complex.  We will feel lost, confused, stuck, frustrated, and like things are impossible or hard to see.  We will think a lot, weigh options, blame, justify, rationalize, validate, but that is all preparation, or said another way, postponement of change.  When we are ready there are no more questions, we just simply see clearly and in that clear seeing we choose differently.  At the end of the day its really that simple.  

It takes however long it takes for us to stop postponing our own change.  It should in some way come as a relief to know this, as it means your ability to shift how you perceive and thus change your programming and the reality you experience is always up to you in each and every moment.  It should feel empowering to know this because it puts you back into the driver’s seat.  The truth is that you have always, always, always been in the driver’s seat, you just haven’t realized that you where.  This is what is called unconsciously creating our reality.  It is based on previous learning and experiences and it tends to just run on automatic in the background.  It doesn’t require much energy and feels somewhat static, which gives the illusion of a consistent or same world in which things can’t change, won’t change or don’t change.  Its not that things don’t change, it’s that you don’t change and when you don’t change the world looks the same day in and day out.  

The key here is that there is no right and no wrong to this.  There is not a right or wrong perception/experience.  There is only your preference.  What is your preference?  How do you want to perceive/experience?  Do you want to look through the lens of fear or the lens of safety?  You are not choice-less in the matter, you are the chooser.  When you get that life is not based on circumstances, but instead is based on you, you will have gotten what it means to live empowered.  

When you live empowered you are consciously, deliberately choosing your perception.  This means that you are free.  Free to decide for yourself.  Free to no longer allow circumstances, conditions or other people and their actions/non-actions decide for you.  No more having to play nice to hope to get what you want or control other peoples actions or responses to you.  Free to see how you desire to see.  Free to live in your preferred reality rather than the one that has been spoon fed to you.  Freedom from backlash or negative impact because you realize that you are in charge and that is true no matter what occurs.  This doesn’t mean that potential “negative” things won’t ever occur, but it does mean that you are the one deciding what you choose to term negative or not.   Again remember not everyone is ready for this level of freedom.  Not everyone wants it yet.  That is ok and perfect.  Do also realize that this freedom is always here, always present and always ready for you once you ready for it.  

Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

Love as a Technology

Love as a Technology 

What is technology?

Concept of human intelligence.When most of us think about technology we think about devices, typically electronic devices.  Whether those devices are the personal equipment we use such as our computers or cell phones, the advancement of software and information systems, electric cars and other transportation devices, or medical equipment.  From our current perspective, technology is seen as advancements that assist us in being potentially more connected, creating opportunities for greater ease and efficiency, and opening up our external world in ways that create novel avenues of experiencing life.  

There is much debate about whether this advancement of technology is good or bad for us, but undeniably we can all agree that the advancement of technology has radially changed our lives on this planet and there is no doubt that technology will continue to improve and advance.  Our technological advancement focus has largely been on the design and creation of inanimate objects rather than focusing on advancements of our own neurological systems and software.  It is almost as if we have collectively failed to see that these bodies and nervous systems that we have, are some of the most advanced “pieces of technology” that are currently on this planet.  It’s too obvious in some ways, in plain sight but overlooked, and the focus has been on the advancement of lifeless objects rather than animate ones.  In this way we have given more power to inanimate objects to advance our life experiences rather than recognize the power of the most intimate animate object that is currently in our existence, our physical body.  

What is it like to see your body as technology?  In spiritual circles we often talk about the body being a vehicle for the soul.  Whatever information that a vehicle (or technology) is wired to tune into it will express.  Said another way, the wiring determines what information and energy can be experienced.  This is as true for our physical vehicles as it is for our inanimate vehicles as well.  Inherent in the system of Network is the advancement of the neurological architecture and circuitry so that you can tune into a wider range of frequencies that allow you to access different information.  This is one of things that makes Network unique among many systems out there.  Its focus is and has always been on advancement of the neurological system.  This is the advancement of our biological technology if you will.   

What’s Love got to do with it? 

The most advanced technology

Blue heart fantasy nebula in spaceThe uniqueness of animate vs. inanimate objects is the capacity for sensorial, emotional, mental and soulful experiences and expressions, rather than just basic input and output of commands.  The capacity and range of these body vehicles that we each have is extraordinary.  Part of the spiritual journey is the development of pathways through this vehicle that allow us more and more access to our soul, which is that next level of development beyond the mind.  So many of us that are here right now have the wiring and/or are creating the wiring, which is allowing for soul energy and information to come through our physical vehicles more and more, which is key to the integration and evolution of our biological advancement to the next level.  

Just as sensations are the information of the body, feelings the information of the emotional body, thoughts the information of the mind, love is the information of the soul.  Many people are attempting to use their mind to understand love or to understand the information contained at the next level of our development, yet the mind is not wired for that function.  This often creates a sense of frustration or hopelessness for many on a spiritual path who keep trying to use their mind to understand love.  This is also why dismantling the idea of you as a separate mind or person has to occur to some level before you can directly experience your soul otherwise you will just keep run up against the edge of your perceived sense of self as a separate person-mind not being able to “see” beyond it.  The primary force, if you will, that dismantles this idea of separateness is love.  

Love heals.  In this way love is a technology in itself.  The most powerful one in my opinion.  Love heals because its knows its already whole and perfect state.  We all know love heals and we preach the power of love, yet we have a tendency to forget it particularly when other parts of our system get activated.  When this happens all of our energy diverts into those other aspects and the information that we receive becomes about survival sensations, intense emotions or habitual thoughts depending on where we get looped.  

The conscious generation of forgiveness of everything and acceptance of all blows the heart open.  When the heart is open your system gets saturated in love.  This love then works on your system.  It creates new pathways, patterns and access points.  You then begin to access and express different information.  The information of love is community, togetherness, interconnectedness, wisdom, grace, awe, pure light, unity, and one.  

Love is the most advanced technology currently available to us.  Some of us have more access to it than others, simply meaning the pathways are more grooved in our systems to express it through this body vehicle, yet love is free, unbound and available to all who have the hunger for it.  I invite you to remember and reconnect to love as often as possible and recognize that this technology is the number one key to the advancement of this entire human race.  

Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

Group Consciousness

Group Consciousness 

Group field effect

The atomic nucleus. Abstract representation. Image molecules and atomsWe are all impacted and influenced by one another.  Never is that more apparent then when collective instability arrives.  For example someone is scared or upset and we begin to notice how it rattles something inside of our being.  We can find ourselves listening to someone speak or reading a piece of news and find ourselves caught in a fear loop, when just 5 minutes earlier we were going along happily without a fear in the world.  The opposite of this is true as well, meaning we can hear someone speak something inspiring or motivational and shift into joy and bliss in a single moment.  This impact on us, dreadful or joyful, can spread if we let it and if it spreads enough, meaning impacts a certain number of people, it creates a group field or group consciousness.  The more energy that is given to a particular thing or idea the larger it grows and the more opportunity it has to impact and engage more consciousnesses into it.  Group fields make information more accessible to more people and with that more people being influenced by the information that is contained within that field.  

Due to the fact that we are all humans, experiencing this reality together, we each feel the effects of group fields to varying degrees.  Our beliefs and perceptions filter how we will experience the information that is contained within a group field.  If we have a belief or perception that is incompatible with the information in the field than that information will not really land anywhere in our system.  However if we have a belief that is compatible or in resonance with the information contained in that group field than we will be influenced by it.  This is neither bad nor good.  Its is inherently neutral.  It really is simply a resonance game.  We are energy beings, being impacted by larger energy fields (group consciousness) and energy either finds resonance and amplifies or finds dissonance and cancels itself out.  For those scientifically inclined we see this in physics with wave interference patterns that are either constructive (increase the amplitude of the wave) or destructive (cancel out the wave).  

When we are talking about group fields it really is about what do we want to amplify (bring more energy too) and what do we want to cancel out (i.e. not add energy too).  Each point within a collective field (being you or I) has an impact on the overall field and how much energy that field will contain.  We often don’t realize that we matter and make a difference to the collective overall experience, but indeed we do.  In fact it would be impossible for you not to have an effect, unless you had absolutely no energy to you at all, which would mean that you were not embodied.  But the hard cold fact is that you are indeed embodied, therefore you have energetic influence that is filtered and directed by your thoughts and beliefs.   

Collective purging 

Embracing instability

Office chaosThe energy with which we give things has an effect.  Not only a collective group field effect, but also a physiological effect on our own nervous system and thus the functioning of our body.  We are all familiar with this through the stress response.  When we perceive a threat, we go into “on-guard mode” also known as self-protection or stress, and our bodies produce chemicals aimed at immediate survival.  This is a healthy response when its warranted.  Its our body’s way to keep homeostasis, self-regulate and purge what is no longer needed or working for the system.  We typically don’t feel well when this response is activated.  Our perspective is also narrowed and focused only on immediate survival.  No energy is available for anything else.  This response is what most people call sickness, though its really just the body purging to keep itself well.  

Purging occurs at the collective level as well.  Times of collective instability such as wars, pandemics, economic crashes and like are the ways in which the larger societal or group system that are no longer working optimally deconstruct in order to reorganize into a more energy efficient configuration.  Nothing is more unstable than collective fear and chaos.  Almost no one would argue that our world is in need of some massive upgrades, that many of our systems need a complete reboot, yet when the waves of instability come crashing in we may not always have the insight to see how what is currently happening is part of what will enable necessary change to occur because we are fully in the “sick” phase where the energy for such insights is not available to us and our perspective is narrowed.  Also although most wouldn’t argue that world change is heavily needed, simultaneously people like their sameness, consistency, and external stability.   Most also dislike putting energy into rebuilding, so when the waves of instability come, we activate our stress response in attempt to keep everything the same and hopefully prevent “bad” change, and then add that energy of frozenness to the collective field.  A frozen collective field will need more waves of instability (meaning more chaotic events) to eventually allow reorganization and change to happen, as change will always happen.  

So what can we do?  Learn to ride the waves of instability rather than being submerged underneath them.  Embrace the constant ever present change that will never stop coming.  Relinquish your attachments to things having been a certain way and invite the novelty of what will arise on the other side.  Discern your fear from your intuition.  Follow your intuition in taking action in whatever ways you need to and that you feel will best support the collective field of humanity.  Meditate and activate love through your entire field adding that to the collective mix; it is more far reaching than you may know.  Realize that your energy will effect the outcome, as well as the learning and change that becomes available to humanity through this global destabilizing force we are collectively experiencing.  Allow any emotions that arise to be felt permissioning your heart to open even more deeply and transmuting fear into love.  Lastly Be well no matter what.  True well-being is independent of any and all circumstances.  It arises as a knowing in you that no matter what you and all are ok.  This knowing and the emanation to it through your field allows you to be a guiding light in the midst of darkness for many.  

Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

Insisting on Non-wrongness

Insisting on Non-wrongness 

Moving past regret, remorse, doubt and judgment

sprial fractalWhat would your life feel like if you insisted on non-wrongness rather than the perspective that things are wrong, that you’ve done something wrong or that there are mistakes that you or others have made?  We are so often tormented by our own inner voices that fight for the story of imperfection and wrongness.  The concept of wrongness is so engrained in our thought patterns that it completely filters and taints the way that we perceive the world.  Most do not even question their perspective of wrongness, they simple accept this perspective unconsciously and live feeling regret, remorse, doubt and in judgment of self or others.  

The perspective of wrongness creates immense suffering.  It kicks people out of the “kingdom of God” or said another way, out of the experience of heaven, bliss, and love at all times.  Rather than perceiving the divine orchestration of God/the universe being all pervasive, our story of wrongness kicks in and says “this is God” and “this is not God”.  Or this one thing is perfect, but this other thing is not perfect.  This is right, but this is wrong.  Hence duality and polarity are created and our experiences are of separation and suffering.  What we fail to realize is that this separation that we are experiencing is not outside of us.  It does not come from some random outer place.  It comes from within our own heads.  It is our mind that determines the story of wrongness and only you can change your mind.  Nothing outside of you can do that for you.  

Why is it that we have this inner judger of right and wrong, perfect and imperfect, and included and not included?  We have been born into and simultaneously have bought into a collective belief system that is driven by this very concept.  Get that wrongness is simply a concept, an idea, it has no real validity except that which have and continue to give to it.  What if you no longer gave any energy to the concept, idea and belief of wrongness?  What if when things arose within your experience of life you saw them as perfect no matter if you liked what was presenting itself or not?  This is the path to everlasting freedom, to perceiving the truth of perfection and the all pervasive intelligent design of every atom and galaxy of the universe.   

Choosing what you’ve chosen 

Beyond the personal

Night sky praiseDue to the fact that we have been submerged in this belief of wrongness for our entire human life there is some work to do in transitioning from perceiving wrongness to non-wrongness.  The first thing is to stop insisting that what is, is in any way wrong whatsoever.  This means everything.  From the thing that your partner said to you that you didn’t like, to the thing you did but regretted or questioned doing after you did it, to something your boss or parents did or didn’t do, to some bad feeling state or physical pain you are experiencing, or some “accident” that occurred that you are perceiving as bad or detrimental.  As you move out of the perspective of wrongness and choose non-wrongness you also no longer experience fear or doubt of any kind because you see more and more the pure perfection of how everything is rather than seeing mistakes or wrongness.  

To choose what you’ve consciously or unconsciously chosen, which is to accept what is, frees you from all self hate and other hate.  To judge as wrong and resist what you’ve chosen is to create separation where there is no separation and it always feels bad.  It leaves you feeling restless, resistant, angry, anxious, annoyed, wounded or hurt.  It creates a state of dis-“ease” and supports separation rather than wholeness.  When you decide to accept your experiences, seeing yourself as the chooser of all of your experiences, whether or not you can see from your current perspective that you’ve chosen what you are experiencing, you experience a coming together and eventual complete unification with all of life.  

Sometimes it is hard for us to see how/why we have chosen certain experiences, particularly painful ones.  What I can say is that someway, somehow we are the ultimate chooser of it all.  Sometimes we choose experiences for our own personal growth and expansion and at other times we choose experiences to help others with their lessons.  Still beyond that we choose experiences to support the collective human species and beyond that the universe at large to expand, evolve and grow.  Our lives are much more than the small personal lives we tend to perceive on a day to day basis.  We are part of much larger and larger bodies that are more inclusive than just our individual lives.  

We are not always aware of what level our choice in experience is supporting.  Whether its just personal, or for other self, the collective or universal, but knowing this and have this perspective that you are bigger than your individual person can help you shift from the question of “why is this happening to me?” and perceiving a sense of alienation or wrongness, into a perspective of seeing the larger orchestration of life of which your person is a part of.  In this larger perspective our individual person often doesn’t know what it is supporting, but it is rested in knowing the non-wrongness that is inherent from this larger perspective.   

Doing the work to choose non-wrongness will open you up more and more to larger perspectives and aspects of your collective and universal being from where you will be able to experience more consistent bliss and love no matter what seems to be occurring in your personal life experience.  

Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

Paradise

Paradise 

Experiencing Heaven on Earth

Waterfalls in Plitvice National ParkImagine paradise.  The gentle wind breezing across the valley.  Sunlight streaming through sky.  Leaves dancing on trees.  Bliss abound.  All you feel is peace.  Everywhere you look all you see is love.  The true nature of nature revealing itself to you as you perceive it.  This is heaven on earth, the kingdom having come, truth experiencing itself.  How is it that paradise becomes your experienced reality rather than simply your imagined fantasy?  What bridges the gap between dreams and reality?  

What makes this seeming leap is simply the reference point from where you view and your recognition as the viewer of it all.  How do you shift your reference point?  Through taking off your armor which keeps you viewing life from a separate person-object perspective and opening into the subject, the seer, the knower of all that is.  Due to our conditioning and thus sense of being a separate person-object it can be hard for our minds to fathom anything but the perspective of being a separate person in a world doing things independently from other separate things.  However it is that very perspective that must be dismantled in order for us to know reality beyond our mind’s limited construction of it, which is often assimilated to be some version less than the blissful paradise we desire.  

From the perspective of separation there will always be doing, trying, getting somewhere, going somewhere, progress and work to do.  In paradise there is only the eternal now.  The present that is always present.  Completely perfect and still in its movement.  Metaphorically speaking many of us are wearing suits that are too tight, staying in perspectives that are so limited in their view, constricting us, making it hard to breath and move freely, and yet we don’t realize that our perspective is completely 100% in our hands.  That we are the ones creating the perspective that we see through and that we are the “Perspectiver.”  No one has told us this.  It like the hidden truth that is in plain sight for all to see if only the curiosity and hunger to look is cultivated.   

Living Armor-less 

Taking off your armor

warrior woman swordInherit in perceiving ourselves as a separate object-person there is a need for self-protection and thus armor.  Armoring can be physical in the way we hold tension in our muscles or body, it can be emotional in the way we allow or don’t allow certain feelings, and it can be mental in the ways we analyze, justify, rationalize and defend ourselves with words or ideas.  That self-protection appears (from the perspective of separation) to keep us alive and out of harms way from objects that are other than us that could potentially hurt us.  Objects could be other people, thoughts and emotions (ours or perceived others), sensations, and other seemingly solid or non-solid structures.  When we are choosing the perspective of separation there will always be perceived things that we need to protect ourselves from.

To be willing to take off our armor of self-protection we must begin to see ourselves beyond being a separate person.  We must be willing to give away our identity, our need for significance, validation, justification, being seen or heard, being right or liked, and also our fears.  We give our power over to what we fear more than anything else.  If we fear we will always perceive the need for self-protection and defense.  Fear is a lack of trust and insisting on separation when there isn’t any.  Love is knowing that no-one and no thing is to blame, that nothing is out of place, and that nothing could ever go wrong or be wrong no matter how detrimental or devastating our mind tries to make it.  

Moving beyond separation requires suspension of our inner judger, or our inner “righter/wronger”.  This little sucker is loud.  It is running the show most of the time and we are asleep to it.  We unconsciously allow it to determine what our experience of life is without even questioning it.  Thus we suffer and create suffering.  We experience wrongness where there is no wrongness.  We see hate where there is only ever love.  Our perspective is so out of sync with the true reality of paradise and we continue to allow it, and beyond that we continue to create it, and re-create it and re-create it, 100 million times a day.

The good new is that you are not and do not need to be a passive agent in the process of waking up any longer.  You truly have never been disempowered, you’ve only failed to recognize your power.  You are and have always been an active participant.  Your now conscious active participation is what is required to bring the perspective of heaven to earth.  It lies within you to do so.  In fact you are the only one who can.  

Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

Destruction

Destruction

Tides of transformation

Hot fires flames in round shapeMost of us fear destruction.  Yet destruction is an inevitable aspect of growth. Things can not stay the same and simultaneously look or be different.  When we allow our fear of deconstruction (i.e. what we think we will lose) to reign we feel stuck, frustrated and powerless. These feelings are simply the postponement of change that must occur.  The only thing that shifts frustration is forward movement. The tendency for most is instead to move backwards into the same habituated thinking patterns because they are known rather than to push forward into the unknown.  Growth does not occur in the known.

What it boils down to is that people want to feel different or have their life be different yet expect that they can remain the same.  They project that they want the situation or circumstance to change, but deny their participation in that change. They fail to see that in every moment life (including their body) responds to them, not to some mysterious, outside, unknown force.  They avoid and deny their power rather than own their power.  The building up of frustration and stuckness rather than the alleviation of it, is what provides the energy for forward momentum.  Due to the fact that we avoid feeling uncomfortable we don’t allow the build up of tension that is required to make change.  Instead we find the most accessible ways in which we can to alleviate it.  Frequently that involves dropping into a lower state of awareness or consciousness where we feel like things are continuing to happen to us, that we are powerless, and that someone or something must fix us rather than us recognizing ourselves in the equation.

If rather than running from our uncomfortable sensations and situations we learn to move towards them, not in a way to fix or get rid of them as if they are some separate object from us, but instead to make contact with ourselves through them, we will be able to harness the energy of stuckness to move forward.  This will begin to expand our perspective of our current situation or circumstance.  The moment that we move towards rather than away from, is the moment that we stretch ourselves beyond our known.  This stretching expands our view of what we can see and allows us to revisit that which previously felt separate to us with new eyes. It allows us to see our patterns and how we are creating the circumstances and situations we’re experiencing, including what’s happening within our body, so that we can make necessary changes that are required. It is at this point that the inevitable destruction that was always eminent is now so clearly in the forefront of our awareness.  It is now no longer a choice that we can grapple with, but instead a must that we must do. 

Destroyer 

Recognizing yourself in the equation

Female with Indian feather hat and colorful makeup.Ultimately destruction is about the dissolution or breakdown of aspects of our self that no longer serve our highest good and don’t allow for optimal function of our bodies and lives.  These parts of us, or more accurately these patterns which we have identified as who we are, are often mysterious to us in the early part of transformation. We can’t yet see that we are the ones creating the circumstances and situations because we are so fused as being the pattern or part.  However when transformation moves to mid phase we begin to gain insight into what is occurring and more importantly our participation with it.  At transformation’s end phase we clearly see how we have been in charge all along and that it’s never been about the situation or circumstance, ever. 

I invite you to see from the perspective that stuckness and frustration is a gift. It is a gift from you, to you, that is showing you that some aspect of your consciousness must be made more aware.  It is the way in which you are teaching yourself to wake up.  Rather than keeping the perspective that tension is a problem or that the circumstance is a problem, see it as an opportunity for growth. Accept that destruction and change is a part of growth.  As you move into the frustration and wake up to seeing your contribution to what is occurring, you will be required to change.  Recognize your own resistance to this.  Recognize your desire to maintain sameness or perceived safety and stability rather than instability and change.  Recognize that things will come and go as required whether you like it or not.  Know that some of those things you will want to hold onto for dear life and yet they remain incompatible with who it is you are waking up to be.  To continue to hold onto those things and attempt to control external circumstances will keep you in a state of suffering and stuckness and suffering and stuckness and suffering and stuckness until the point where you have finally had enough. 

Some of us will tolerate suffering and stuckness for such a long time because we are so afraid of change, growth and what we think we will lose along the way, but change and growth is the nature of this universe. To remain the same or in resistance/fear to change when change is eminent, is nothing short of a miserable life experience as the soul cannot express through you in the ways that it desires due to your persistent attempts to try to control it.  

Nothing remains the same.  Nothing.  You can hold onto absolutely nothing. The deeper that you can accept this the more easily you will allow the process of destruction and transformation to run its course in whatever ways are needed. This will accelerate your journey as a soul who’s sole function is to expand and express.  Ultimately you are the destroyer/changer.  Destruction and change do not happen to you, you are not a victim of them, instead you initiate them because you realize that you must.  This is the realization and actualization of your power. 

Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

Your life is not your own

Your life is not your own

Existence beyond being a body

Basic RGBTruly your life has never been your own.  What the heck does that mean?  If your life isn’t yours than whose is it?  That is a great beginning question to ask yourself.  We make a lot of assumptions about who/what we are with very little investigation as to if those assumptions are true.  One of the primary assumptions that pretty much most everyone makes is that they are a separate person.  It is hard to fathom otherwise.  If you aren’t the you that you’ve thought that you are then who are you exactly?  What would it even be like to know yourself other than the you that you think you are?

Let’s start at the beginning.  Not just the beginning of your memory or of this physical body, but of who/what you were before your were born.  Did you exist or does your existence only begin once you have a body, and even beyond that when you are aware that you have a body?  When you where a baby, prior to your physical memory or knowingness that you had a body or existed, did you not yet exist?  Simply because we don’t have a physical memory of our existence or an awareness that we exist does not mean that we do not exist.  Nothing proves this more than when we are infants, not yet knowing that we have a body or that we exist, and yet we clearly un-doubtingly exist.  

Existence has nothing to do with whether or not we have a body or know we have a body.  That being the case we must entertain that our life as we know our life to be may very well be made up of a bunch of untrue assumptions that we’ve simply learned that we are rather than the truth of who we are.  If this idea that you are not your body is true, and you exist without a body and even without the awareness that you exist, that poses a whole world of new questions to ask yourself about what is and what you are. 

Asking these questions opens up the doors to a new knowingness of yourself, but you must earnestly seek to find.  For without the hunger to discover more, more will not be discovered.  That impulse inside of you must be sparked alive in order to provide the energy needed to guide your path and attract the ever expanding awareness of who and what you are to you.   

The Grand Orchestrator 

Coming to know your true self

Bright Flower of Life With Stars On WhiteI like to use the analogy of the body, meaning this body that you have which currently houses your being, as one cell in a much larger body.  Just like this human body is made up of trillions of cells that are specialized to perform certain functions, there is a larger body which all humans, and really everything in creation, make up together.  As humans we often are not aware that this larger body, of which we are inseparably a part of, exists.  Yet simply because we are not aware of it doesn’t mean that it does not exist.  It just means that we haven’t become aware of it yet.  

For simplicity sake recognize that every human, animal, plant and mineral form on this earth is really just one body (not multiple bodies) and that every individuated expression, meaning each and every form of this one body, has its own specialized function depending on its blueprint.  At the level of the human body cell we call this blueprint DNA.  DNA is that encoded information which tells an individual cell in the body how to function.  Going to the next level up, which is the mind (i.e. what most of us identify as who we are) organizes the entire human organism so that there is harmonization of all of the cells and systems of the body working together rather than individual cells just doing their own thing.   In this way you can think of the mind as blueprint/DNA for the entire human body as a unit.  Then at the next level beyond that, that of the larger one body of which all is a part of, the blueprint is the soul.  The soul writes the instructions for all of creation.  You can think of the soul as the DNA for the collective creation body.  Even the soul, which knows oneness and inseparability, has something that informs it, which is the grand orchestrator.  You can call this source, God, Love or whatever name fits your fancy.  It is the ultimate intelligence from which all of creation or all of the universe is born and that which informs and organizes all of it.  

This brings us back to the beginning and this notion that your life is not your own.  Your life is 100% completely divinely orchestrated.  Not because your body or mind is in charge, but because something beyond what you may currently know is in charge.  When life appears to not be going your way or things occur that you don’t like, it is because you are seeing from a very limited perspective.  Its the perspective of being a separate human being, which you have never been.  That which is viewing the circumstances is the separate body-mind which is not yet aware of its larger body self.

So what is your choice here?  The choice is to surrender to that which appears to be mysterious to our mind and learn to develop faith.  Faith is how you will come to know yourself beyond the mind.  Faith is the bridge from mind to soul.  Faith allows you to recognize your self beyond this person you’ve come to know yourself to be.  Faith is the end of all resistances, all insistences, all wrongness, all judgment.  Faith is the end of experiencing separateness.  Faith is the end of suffering.  Faith brings you home into the remembrance and recognition of the larger truth that you are.  When you get this you experience total freedom and not the powerless that the mind thinks it will experience because it comes to the end of thinking its charge.  Instead you become fully empowered in the truth of you.

Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

Self-trust

Self-trust 

What we know & that we know

Water Lily, Radiant Orange Lotus with Rays of LightHow much permission do you give yourself to listen to yourself, and even beyond that to know that you know even if you don’t know what you know?  How frequently do you find yourself looking to something or someone to affirm you or tell you what to do?  We are taught from a very young age to look towards others to tell us what do and what is acceptable, right or ok.  Many of us have experienced punishment from having “done the wrong thing” or “behaving the wrong way”, which has reinforced the idea inside of our heads that we don’t know.  This is the birth of self-doubt and the questioning that we can know for ourselves.

What we know and that we know are two very different things.  People can know many different things than us.  For example someone may be very proficient in physics or human dynamics, where another might know about culture and religion.  These are all areas of study or experiences which inform us in worldly ways.  Unfortunately what we know is often the basis for how we perceive our value and worth.  Our culture has placed a lot of value on what we know rather than our capacity to simply know that we know.  If people appear to know a lot of information or have some special skill set we see them as more “knowing” than us and with this we have a tendency to view ourselves as less than in some way.  This is the root of the unworthiness that so many of us have felt and experienced.  

There is a difference between being able to receive the gifts of someone’s knowing versus giving our power over to them.  To receive another’s gifts with appreciation of their sharing rather than as the knower or decider for us (or others) is healthy receiving as we don’t see ourselves as less than in the dynamic.  However when we see others as better than us or we perceive them to know more about ourselves then we can know because we are riddled with self-doubt, then we are giving our power to them.  They may or may not want to be in that role of having your power, but nonetheless you’ve given your knowing that you know over to the perception of what another knows.  This is a recipe for disaster and a life of feeling unnecessarily bad about yourself.   

Self-denial 

Refusing to see your own self

The woman covers her face with a knitted hat and turns awayWhen we don’t trust ourselves it is very hard to relax and be present with others.  We are always running scripts inside our heads, overanalyzing our behaviors, actions and what we said or didn’t say, and we feel confused a lot.  Confusion is natural as it is part of growth, however anguish is not.  Self-doubt often leads to slow forward movement in life.  Not being able to decide and constantly feeling like you don’t know for yourself.  There are always rhythms of more clarity and production and then feeling less clear and productive, but to continue the story that you don’t know for you is the worst kind of self-punishment there is.  

There isn’t anyone that knows better for you than you.  That can feel a bit overwhelming or scary at first for some people as it means that you are now accountable and responsible for yourself fully.  It also means that you can’t use the excuse anymore that you don’t know.  Saying that you don’t know is form of self-denial.  Clearly there will always be things that you don’t know and you will always be learning in those more worldly ways if you so choose.  Ultimately the what of what occurs or happens in life, meaning how situations, circumstances or relationships turn out, is always deeply trenched in mystery which only reveals itself in the moment it is experienced, but the knowing that you know never changes, never goes anywhere unless you allow it too.  Unless you refuse to see or acknowledge yourself.  It is from knowing that you know all life is birthed and all experience had.  It is not so important what happens, which ironically is what we tend to put all of our focus on, but only that we know that we know.

What would it be like if you shifted your focus off of the known and onto the one that knows the known?  Trust would be inherent.  There would be nothing to doubt as experience would be arriving in the moment as you were present to it.  You wouldn’t have to try and navigate all the unknowns that your mind conjures up or get stuck in your head trying figure it all out.  

Self-trust is not about knowing what is going to happen.  It is not about controlling any kind of outcome.  It is not about protecting yourself.  It is about boldly being fully open and rested in your own knowing, in that you know, and not what you know.  End of story.  This ends self-doubt.  This ends self-torment.  Freedom to just be you arrives.  Undefended.  Nothing to protect, fear or hide.  It is in this way that you can truly receive others without feeling less about yourself.  It is a meeting of knower to knower, creator to creator, god/goddess to god/goddess.  

Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal  Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado

Becoming

Becoming 

Making the shift into who you desire to be

VanityYou have all probably heard the phrase: think it, feel it, become it.  Its often used to reference a process of transformation in becoming something that what we desire to become.  We use our thoughts to think it, then our feeling bodies to feel the qualities we want to become, and through feeling it we become it.  When we want to become something anew there is often also a process of simultaneously undoing who we have previously thought ourselves to be as frequently who we desire to be now is in conflict with what we currently think we are.  

Most of us aren’t even really aware of who it is that we currently are and even beyond that. that who we are is a choice.  We don’t realize that we carry many underlying assumptions and hidden beliefs about ourselves that are based on our life experiences.  If fact most all of who we think we are has been based on our life experiences.  How frequently does it seem that our life experiences have just happened to us, particularly early on in our lives when a large portion of our identity is formed, but even continuing through into the present?  Therefore how much do we just assume that this is “just who I am” and not question it or think that we could ever be different?  This is one of the conundrum’s of having lived disempowered and not realizing that we have always been in the driver’s seat.  If we begin to see/accept that we have chosen every single one of our life experiences (this occurs through acceptance of what was/is) then we can begin to see how our identity has been chosen by us.  This is a breath of fresh air because that means we can also choose anew at any moment.

The assumptions we have about who we are also come with a lens of perception.  That lens of perception becomes the filter with which we then view ourselves through.  Meaning say that we have an assumption that we are weak, strong, cold, warm, unloving, loving, kind, unkind, likable or unlikeable, etc. then we experience ourselves as those qualities and we also view our world from that perception of ourselves.  This is quite literally how we “create our reality”.  Our reality is created by who it is that we think we are and that lens of perception than filters everything we see.  This is why if we want to change our reality (i.e. experience of life) we must actually just change ourselves, as reality follows our perception which comes from our sense of identity.  

Final Becoming 

Relinquishing our role identities 

Surreal portraitOne of the ways to bring more awareness to the self-discovery process of who it is you believe yourself to be is to take a look at your roles, and the responsibilities and activities that come along with them.  These are often indicators as to who it is we think that we are.  Perhaps you are a business man/woman, a scientist, doctor, community leader, a father/mother, daughter/son, wife/husband, an organizer or planner, an athlete, outdoorsy, indoorsy, a reader, an adventurist, etc.  Looking at your roles provides insight into who it is you identify yourself as being.

Again who it is you identify yourself as being is how you will experience yourself and the world.  Let’s say for example that you have the role of being a “wife” or an “athlete”.  Often when we take on a role, we identify as being that role.  You think that you are a wife or an athlete and therefore that role becomes part of your identity.  Every role always comes with some level of expectation of how we must show up within that role.  That expectation could be created by us or have been created by others.  Either way if we’ve agreed with ourselves that a particular expectation lives within a certain role, and if we don’t fulfill those expectations, then we take it as a personal deficit.  

The truth is that we are not our roles, nor the responsibilities or activities that come along with them, but because we are merged as the role then when we don’t meet those role’s responsibilities or perform the activities associated with the role we feel bad about ourselves.  The self that we feel bad about is not our true self.  The self we feel bad about is only the one with which we’ve come to identify ourselves as through becoming the role.  To relinquish being merged with our role’s identities doesn’t mean that we can’t/don’t still participate in the responsibilities and activities that come along these roles.  It simply means that we don’t identify ourselves as the role.  The falling away of being merged with any and all roles is what allows you to taste and know your true self, which is beyond any and all roles.  This is the final becoming.  

Simply put the process is this.  Fully accept yourself as you think you are right now.  Investigate your roles and decipher who it is that you’ve created yourself to be.  See how that has filtered your entire perception of life.  Recognize the power of think it, feel it, become it.  Who is it that you desire to be now?  Through full acceptance of who you’ve been there is no longer resistance or incongruence with who you are wanting to become.  Think and feel your current desire of who you want to be often.  Realize that the final becoming is the embrace of all the things you have thought that you are not.  This allows you to realize that you are all and ultimately that you are the chooser/becomer of whatever becomes and not the becoming itself.

Dr. Amanda Hessel, Chiropractor, Network Spinal  Analysis & Somato-Respiratory Integration, Boulder, Colorado